Trendy Funny Quotes

  • People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.
  • I accidentally messed up my life. How do I start a new account?
  • The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.
  • The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.
  • A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.
  • Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a thousand bats to get out of social situations.