Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
  • I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.
  • My toxic trait is destroying my room every time I get dressed.
  • Two mysterious people live in my house. “Somebody” and “Nobody.” Somebody did it and nobody knows who.
  • Not much is worse than that feeling of going back to work after a lunch, or a vacation, or just going to work in general.
  • I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s like 7 years in a row now.