Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Whoever removed the 30th and 31st from February, come get the 14th too.
  • Petition to lower the retirement age. I’m tired now.
  • Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.
  • Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.
  • I forgot my password, failed the captcha and have been accused of being a robot. I don’t even know how to fight these allegations.
  • Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?