23 funny sentence quotes - Wordgag

It’s so beautiful to see people just give up at work this time of year. I’m getting emails that do not include any complete sentences.

May 29, 2026

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

May 27, 2026

I got called “pretty” today! Well, the full sentence was “You’re pretty annoying,” but I only focus on the positive things.

May 27, 2026

Spending 5 minutes looking up every word I want to use in a sentence to make sure I can define it in case they ask.

May 26, 2026

If you finish every sentence with “as the prophecy foretold”, your coworkers will leave you alone.

May 26, 2026

I end all my sentences with “Just saying..” because ending them with “You bonehead..” would probably be considered offensive.

May 25, 2026

Couples who finish each other’s sentences have killed before and will kill again.

May 25, 2026

People found guilty of not using punctuation deserve the longest sentence possible.

May 25, 2026

Starting your most incoherent sentence with “put simply” to deflect blame onto the reader.

May 24, 2026

A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. For example: Jill ate her friend’s sandwich VS Jill ate her friend’s colon.

May 23, 2026

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

May 23, 2026

According to a new study, people who often trail off in the middle of a sentence are 30% more likely to

May 23, 2026

I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

May 22, 2026

Big fan of the comma, just great. Like look, I just made you pause the sentence as you read it. Oh look, I just did it again.

May 22, 2026

You can add “cha cha cha” to any sentence you want without explaining yourself. Nobody really appreciates this.

May 22, 2026

If you start a sentence with “Let me reiterate…”, I’m gonna ignore it the second time too.

May 22, 2026

I’m not going to die because of an accident. Nor because of an illness. But from small talk. Someone will say one boring sentence too many and I’ll drop dead.

May 21, 2026

Accordion to current studies, 90% of you did not realize that this sentence started with a musical instrument.

May 21, 2026

Every time I have to repeat myself, a new curse word gets added into the sentence.

May 21, 2026

Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

May 20, 2026

Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences largely goes unnoticed.

May 20, 2026

I’m at an age now where I start sentences with “I’m at an age now.”

May 20, 2026

Married life: Telling your partner the same sentence 7 days in a row, only for him to say, “You definitely never told me that!”

May 20, 2026