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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

I disagree with my politics.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Being skinny may be nice, but chicken nuggets are even nicer.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

When they say screen time is bad for you, they just mean the ones at work, right?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

The thing about being 50+ is that whenever an opportunity to pee is available – you’re wise to take it.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Panties is such a weird word. Panties. I can’t say it sexy.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

You know it’s cold outside when you go outside and it’s cold.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Who the hell keeps letting it be Monday again?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,622

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

Unfollowing girls on Instagram as soon as they get a boyfriend is something I’ll never stop doing.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Is it stupid and irresponsible? Yes. Will it make me happy? Also yes.

Spreading quickly via X:

It’s nice to have a moment to breathe before reality knocks the wind out of you again.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Unless it’s manic, I don’t want to hear about your Monday.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Hot singles over 40 in your area are curious what you use for joint pain and inflammation.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Being single: When you don’t have to wait for someone to watch the next Netflix episode.

Breaking via YouTube:

I spend all day on Facebook so that Mark Zuckerberg can eat.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

New year update: losing everything but weight.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I like my men like I like my coffee. Not that hot but still making me anxious.

By the way, if you don’t buy anything on Black Friday, you can save up to 100%.

0
By the way, if you don’t buy anything on Black Friday, you can save up to 100%.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
🛍️💸 "Who needs discounts when you have the ultimate budget-saving strategy of not buying anything at all on Black Friday? That's how you secure that sweet 100% off deal! It's the art of masterful non-shopping. Your wallet thanks you, and your inner bargain hunter is probably scratching its head in confusion!" 💡🙅‍♂️

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on Twitch this month:

My favorite thing to do on the weekend is not leave my house.

37 shares on Threads this month:

Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

71 shares on Threads this month:

I’m sorry I bit your hand when you reached for my popcorn.

55 shares on Telegram this month:

When I say “the other day”, it can be anytime between yesterday and my birth.

52 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Just because I’m friendly doesn’t mean I like you. It just means that I’m not rude.

87 shares on Facebook this month:

At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

A bird just flew into our glass door. Іt’s not dead. Just really embarrassed.

93 shares on Telegram this month:

I be like, “Awwwww cows,” and then go and eat two double cheeseburgers, lol.

58 shares on Pinterest this month:

The older I get, the more I realize how much I love being at home, doing nothing.

67 shares on Telegram this month:

“Life is a marathon, not a sprint.” Cool, I dislike both of those things.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

SHEIN does entirely too much on their app. Feels like a freaking casino every time you open it.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Even if there’s a murderer behind me, finish chewing before you tell me.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My boyfriend always complains that I never smile, but he’s the one who wanted a serious relationship.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The dude who invented the autocorrect has died. Restaurant in piece.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Terrible things can happen if you go camping. For starters, you could want to go camping again.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,338

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

“Full-time” should be 20 hours max, man. This is ridiculous. I’ve got other stuff to do.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Toddlers: I’ve licked everything so everything is mine now.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I rock it as a parent, other times I drop my phone on my sleeping child while taking a picture of it. It’s called balance.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

I was told to be more optimistic so I’ve decided french fries aren’t bad for me.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

My diet plan is sometimes, when I’m eating chips, I drop some on the floor, and I don’t eat those ones.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Not enough rap songs about stores suddenly changing their layout.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Her heart is a combination of wildflowers and wildfires, delicate, yet so fierce.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

I enjoy driving because it combines my desire to sit with my talent for being angry.

Making waves on Messenger:

I want to be in Metallica, and they will not let me.

Seen just now on Slack:

Kim Kardashian wants her ashes to be scattered in the sea after her death. As if there wasn’t enough plastic there already.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

Spotted on Twitch:

Not to sound like a potted plant, but sunlight and fresh air really make a difference.

Making waves on Telegram:

Imagine buying a new car, and some superhero throws it at an alien.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Rental car companies seem so insanely helpless at their one job. You show up at the airport, reservation in hand, and they’re like, ‘Wait, really? You wanted a car? Sorry, you totally caught me off guard.’

Shared recently on Twitch:

My superpower is embarrassing myself.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I would like to opt out of WW3, por favor.

Trending via WeChat:

Before social media, you had to actively go out and find crazy people.

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