Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

76% of pardoned turkeys end up back in the system.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

I’m so single right now that I stood on a cliff and shouted, “I love you,” and my echo replied, “I just wanna be friends.”

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

No, thanks—social drama. Puberty sucked enough the first time around.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

No, he didn’t ghost you, you just left him speechless, forever.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in this whirlpool of emotions over there.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I’ve been doing Dry January, but it’s literally just been my lips and skin.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Taking yesterday’s bad mood on a multi-day tour.

Breaking via YouTube:

Bands are always like “here’s another song”. Yeah, no shit, that’s pretty much all you do.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I have been touched inappropriately by the sun today.

Shared recently on Threads:

“Cut my life into pieces” screamed the earthworm and threw itself in front of my spade.

Trending via Messenger:

No, I’m not depressed. I’m sure there’s just something wrong with the planets or stars or something.

Seen just now on Discord:

Sorry, I wasn’t really listening but that’s awesome, unless it isn’t of course.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Getting the ick because he put the windshield wipers on at a higher rate than was needed.

Just shared via Reddit:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

Breaking via Twitch:

Can I be speaker? I’m pretty good at saying a lot without saying anything at all.

Calm down, engine light, if I can run on broken parts, so can you.

Witty quote about resilience and humor, comparing running on broken parts to staying calm.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Hey there, engine light! Don't stress out, we're all a little broken inside. If this car can keep going with its quirks, so can you! 💪🔧 Keep twinkling, you little warning light, you're not the boss of us!"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

51 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t argue with my kids anymore. I just vacuum every surface of the living room while they’re trying to watch TV.

83 shares on X this month:

Satan: “Would you please stop sacrificing animals to me. I’m not running a zoo down here.”

77 shares on Telegram this month:

The worst part about being in your 40s is the 10 years of listening to people say, “Wait till you’re 50.”

23 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I wish I had the confidence of someone who would let themselves be tattooed in a place they can’t see.

51 shares on Snapchat this month:

Another day without sex, but a mosquito just sucked on my neck and I moaned a little bit.

65 shares on Telegram this month:

You ever spend the day with a skinny person and are like “ohhhh, that’s why you’re skinny”.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

I give such good nudes that nobody ever needs to ask me for a second one.

80 shares on Slack this month:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

62 shares on X this month:

I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

A hostile alien invasion sounds like a nice change of pace.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Intro to salsa class was weird, I starved myself all day, there was no chips or dips and then these weirdos were all grabby and dancing around.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

These quiet electric cars are really annoying. I have to stop scrolling and look up while walking outside now.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Genuinely nothing worse than going bowling with people who are actually good. Like, why are you doing all that?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Establish dominance over your children by whining louder.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My fridge turns into a food retirement home, as soon as I buy groceries.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Julia Garner most confusing name because it calls to mind both Julia Roberts and Jennifer Garner, but she is neither.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I drive like I’m immortal.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I would be more patient if it didn’t take so long.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of growing up to satisfy user needs in a way that meets business goals for transformative outcomes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,460

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

The Playstation is broken and the child has noticed that I live here too.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I look so pretty today. I should go for a walk and let the people enjoy this.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I’ve never met a cake I didn’t want to fork.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

What substance do I have to abuse to stop yearning?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Nothing worse than when I turn up to Park Run to find it is indeed going ahead.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Music just makes living on this earth a little bit more bearable.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomachs?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Life update: it’s getting worse.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I poked your tweet with a stick, hoping it would do something.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

The best proof that fairy tales are fictional is the fact that the prince is always an intelligent and handsome single man.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’m not an alcoholic, I only drink twice a year. When it’s sunny, and when it isn’t.

Live now on Reddit:

You are never too old to achieve your dreams. Prince Charles had to wait 73 years.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

My mood is currently on “shuffle”.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Well, like I said to my television the other day, “How can these people be so stupid?!?”

Shared recently on TikTok:

If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.

Spotted on WeChat:

I think I’m closer to retirement than to a relationship.

Going viral on Threads:

My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

Going viral on Twitch:

I did vote once but only because I thought the line was to a buffet.

Trending via Messenger:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

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