Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who can resist the urge to gobble down those adorable little nuggets of joy on four legs? 🐶🍗 Just make sure to ask for a side of belly rubs and extra wagging tails to go with it!"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Whoever invented the gender reveal party needs to be launched into the sun.

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2 months ago

exaggeration, gender, gender reveal, humor, invention, needs, party, reveal, satire, sun
All this overthinking, and I still make the worst decisions.

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2 months ago

decision, decisions, humor, i, overthinking, self-deprecating, still, worst, worst decision
They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.

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3 days ago

app, experience, frustration, invent, invention, media, refresh, should, social, social media, technology, timeline, Twitter, user, user experience, where
Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

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2 months ago

before, buy, chocolate, experience, filled, food, grocery, grocery shopping, healthy, healthy food, i, impulse, impulse buy, marshmallow, me, self-control, shopping, shopping experience, temptation
I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

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2 months ago

awkward, awkward moment, complicated, confusion, door, doors, everyday, everyday life, humor, i, irony, life, moment, pull, pull door, push, push door, relationship
The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

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2 months ago

comparison, dark, day, exhaustion, full, humor, meetings, night, same, same thing, terrors, thing, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

Rather than work on my issues, I’m counting on my personality getting changed by a falling coconut.

14 shares on Facebook this month:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

17 shares on Twitch this month:

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

36 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.

43 shares on Snapchat this month:

Please continue to leave me out of the loop.

95 shares on Instagram this month:

Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.

30 shares on Messenger this month:

I could never be in the mafia, those guys stay up way to late.

99 shares on Instagram this month:

What age will I grow out of not answering the door when I’m home and sneaking around the house to find out who’s knocking?

36 shares on Instagram this month:

They just don’t put milkshakes in the yard like they used to.

50 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you tell lies about me, I’ll tell the truth about you.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Just blocked someone for correcting my spelling and it feelded great.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

I was blinded by a goddamn deer with a shiny red nose… No, officer, I haven’t been drinking.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Laugh all you want. My Encyclopedia Britannica set will never require WiFi.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

I’m just trying to have a nice time despite knowing facts and information.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Wild how we don’t get a public holiday for Wrestlemania, but okay.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Sometimes my toddler throws stuff on the floor and then shouts “OH NO” and that’s kind of like what politicians do.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Watching 2+ movies a day to prevent a thought from happening.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

When I am calculating any risk, I think to myself: is this first cat life behavior? Or ninth cat life behavior?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

Tattoo idea for men: spider webs in the corners of the receding hairline.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I love being an adult and sitting absolutely still and suddenly I’ve hurt my neck somehow.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’ll never understand why the volume in movies is always mixed in such a way that you can barely understand the dialog and your neighbor gets war flashbacks during action scenes.

Making waves on Pinterest:

How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Just shared via WeChat:

Skinny people are easier to get blown around by storms. These donuts are for my safety.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skill set I simply wasn’t born with.

Just landed via X:

To the tune of ‘Everybody Dance Now’: Himalayan Sea Salt

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m dying for some sweets and the only thing sweet in the house is me.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Some people aren’t just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone.

Making waves on Instagram:

Yeah, Instagram is bad for our mental health, but what about Outlook?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Whoever invented the gender reveal party needs to be launched into the sun.

All this overthinking, and I still make the worst decisions.

They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.

Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨