Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Life is a dangerous game, so might as well go down in style! 🎲💥 Whether it's skydiving, spicy food, or extreme knitting, make sure your demise is one for the books! 😜🔥"

activity, choice, everything, fun, kill, life, pick, something

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on Slack this month:

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

94 shares on Telegram this month:

A diamond is forever, and so is my teen’s grudge against me for some random stuff every other day.

97 shares on YouTube this month:

Self-cleaning conscience.

92 shares on Twitch this month:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

58 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

54 shares on Threads this month:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

76 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t need to learn something new, I need to remember something old, like why did I come into this room?

29 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m so old, I used to block people by simply holding the door shut.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

Somebody needs to get my shit together.

10 shares on Facebook this month:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Still can’t believe we have a federal holiday to celebrate the 1996 hit movie Independence Day.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Spending 5 minutes looking up every word I want to use in a sentence to make sure I can define it in case they ask.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

First caveman to see fire: Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs (stomps it out) and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

My dad wasn’t absent or present; he was a secret third thing.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Clothes too dirty for the closet, but too clean for laundry. Welcome to: the chair.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

If Spotify has taught me anything, it’s that I don’t know the correct lyrics to any of my favorite songs.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Teens are like, “My homework isn’t done, but check out this presentation I made on why I need Instagram.”

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

The gothic urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a terrifying backstory.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

I put the mess in domestic.

Making waves on YouTube:

US etiquette question: Do you need to tip the guy at the border who reads your last five years of social media history?

Just landed via Reddit:

My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

Live now on Twitch:

I don’t understand why bugs come inside when they have a whole outside to themselves.

Going viral on Instagram:

Never underestimate the healing power of not watching the news.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

“You’re always sleeping,” God forbid a woman wants to be unconscious.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I often choose gift bags instead of wrapping, not just out of laziness, but also because I have the fine motor skills of a drunken panda.

Shared recently on Threads:

Hey, sorry I can’t go out tonight. I already showered and got into bed, and now I’m busy rubbing my feet together like a little grasshopper.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Netflix will help you finish the name of the movie you’re typing, and then tell you they don’t have it.

Going bananas on Slack:

Coffee is better when you have no work.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

I wish there was a nicer way to say “my natural tendency to spot patterns is making me feel very uncomfortable about you”.

I always feel sleepy, except when I want to sleep.

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

Yeah, no worries, man. You just showed everyone that you have a lot of resentments bubbling underneath, but otherwise, it was a cool evening.

I wish there was a nicer way to say “my natural tendency to spot patterns is making me feel very uncomfortable about you”.

I always feel sleepy, except when I want to sleep.

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨