Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

RIP to everyone killed by the Gods for their hubris, but I’m different. And better. Maybe even better than the Gods.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Sorry, I’m late. I got here when I wanted to.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

Having a teenager is fun because the voice in my head that questions everything I do now has a friend.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Why can’t the house clean itself? It seems to get dirty by itself.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a hot tub.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

You’re confusing me with someone who cares what you think of me.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

If you play guitar in a band, always make sure to look like it hurts to play.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

768 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,930

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,930

Updated

49 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

Spotted on Reddit:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Good morning. I’m ready for attention now.

Breaking via X:

Tried Adderall to help my productivity but now I’m just intensely aware of all the things I should be doing.

Seen just now on WeChat:

“I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” I asked God to strike me dead with lightning.

Making waves on Twitch:

I’m running out of people I like.

Trending via Telegram:

I’ve touched enough cacti to know they are sharp, but also not enough to stop touching cacti.

Reported on Messenger:

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

Trending via Twitch:

Alexa, turn off the planet.

Home » Funny Asylum Quotes

Funny asylum quotes

New funny asylum quotes 👇

For even more funny asylum quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny asylum quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

768 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,930

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,930

Updated

49 minutes ago

Users Online

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

At Christmas time, all outstanding invoices are always transferred with the reference “Hohoho”.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

I hate it when I’m gossiping at work and a customer wants to be served. How rude is that?

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Shoulda named my daughter Calculus cause damn she’s complicated.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Go outside and let the rain do what your boyfriend can’t.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

It’s interesting growing up and discovering that most adults are not that clever. I had my suspicions as a kid but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Doomscrolling: because who doesn’t love anxiety as a hobby?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Once I get my UFO, don’t be asking me for rides.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

Sorry I’m late. I was scraping the clearance tag off your Christmas present.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Death cannot harm me more than you have harmed me, my beloved life.

Making waves on Facebook:

The porn bots liking my posts from years ago is just reminding me that I’ve always been hilarious.

Making waves on WeChat:

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.

Just shared via Threads:

In English we say: “You changed.” But in poetry we say: “You became a stranger wearing the face I used to love, and I am haunted by the ghost of who you were.”

Shared recently on Reddit:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

Spotted on Messenger:

“We should get tickets” is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

Spotted on Discord:

I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

And then there are those dates after which you think: “Have I really shaved my legs for this?”

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴