24 Funny blood quotes — Wordgag ツ

I was gonna kiss you under the blood moon eclipse, but whatever, bro.

3 weeks ago3 weeks ago

“What’s your blood type?” I don’t know, boiling!

1 month ago1 month ago

I used to mix Mountain Dew with the cheapest vodka I could find, and I called it the Blood of Mannaroth because it’s green and turns you into an orc.

3 months ago3 months ago

Wanna perform obscene blood rituals under the full moon, or nah?

3 months ago3 months ago

Will mosquitoes ever develop a pizza obsession and end their pursuit of human blood?

3 months ago3 months ago

Does your blood pump that way just for me?

4 months ago4 months ago

Not trying to brag but I just beat the high score on this blood pressure machine.

Mar 17, 2025

You have one week to ask me to be your Valentine. Requests must be in the form of poetic verse written in your blood.

Feb 9, 2025Feb 9, 2025

When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

Feb 5, 2025Feb 5, 2025

Coffee ain’t gonna cut it today. I need the blood of my enemies.

Jan 29, 2025

Tried a smile yesterday and my white blood cells attacked it.

Jan 25, 2025

Donating blood today to make room for more food.

Jan 25, 2025

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

Jan 25, 2025

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

Jan 25, 2025

I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

Jan 24, 2025

Too bad mosquitos are not into human fat the way they are into human blood.

Jan 23, 2025

I refuse to go to a blood bank. I’m not taking your blood money.

Jan 23, 2025

The world would be a better place if mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood.

Jan 23, 2025

How can vampires enjoy drinking our hot blood in the summer and other thoughts that keep me up at night.

Jan 23, 2025

Girls will be like “it’s fine” then start drawing a pentagram in blood on their floorboards.

Jan 22, 2025