Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Wanna know what the 90’s were like? Put your phone down and go outside.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Females be cheating in healthy relationships, but are faithful in toxic ones.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

I see no action figures, puzzles, or board games. I thought you said you wanted to play with me.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Daylight savings is just a made up holiday to sell more daylight.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, sleeping for work, getting ready for work, or thinking about work.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s: you get tired from sleeping now.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Words I heard most when I ran errands with my dad: “Wait in the truck.”

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,421

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via TikTok:

“My family doesn’t have a black sheep,” I say, while everyone avoids eye contact.

Just landed via WeChat:

I miss the old days back in 1955, when I didn’t exist.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Unless it’s manic, I don’t want to hear about your Monday.

Seen just now on X:

My youngest started kindergarten today and I cried, but mostly for his teachers.

Going viral on YouTube:

So much anger in this small little body. I feel like a chihuahua.

Going viral on Messenger:

I’ll see you in court (at the marriage registry) (I love you)

Broadcasted on Threads:

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.

Just shared via X:

I could never be in the mafia, those guys stay up way to late.

Going bananas on Threads:

I wish I could Shazam a perfume.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I like listening to podcasts because it’s basically getting to enjoy a conversation without having to participate in it.

25 Funny blood quotes

Funny blood quotes add a dash of humor to the often serious topic of health and medical quirks! 🩸😂 Whether it’s witty remarks about the trials of donating blood or amusing takes on vampire lore, these quotes provide a light-hearted perspective. Embrace the funny side of blood-related moments and enjoy a chuckle! 😄🩺

New funny blood quotes 👇

For even more funny blood quotes, hit next 👇

All funny blood quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

74 shares on YouTube this month:

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear I’ll need, but I never look at them again.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

Not going is the new leaving early.

86 shares on Messenger this month:

What idiot called it Catfishing your Tinder Contacts and not Playing With Matches?

31 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Maybe we should put monkeys in charge for a while just to see how it goes.

25 shares on Discord this month:

I like to establish dominance by yawning the minute someone tries to make small talk with me.

65 shares on Threads this month:

Maybe the problem is that I’m cooler than any man I’ve ever met.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

There’s two sides to every story, and then there’s these screenshots I got.

11 shares on Pinterest this month:

I hate overhead lighting – trying to mimic the holy sun should be considered sinful. The lamp is much better, mimicking the hearths of our forebears.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

I love being a pretty woman because it widens the threshold for cringe-worthy things I can say.

12 shares on X this month:

The feelings I have for Tom Cruise are the closest approximation I have to what patriotism must feel like.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Cholesterol has a special place in my heart.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t scare me. You’re not those two minutes when I can’t find my wallet.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

A good man is hard to find, but a babysitter for Friday night is harder.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

If you put a pizza on top of a pizza, you have two pizzas. But if you stack two lasagnas, then you still have one lasagna.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

In high school I was voted “most likely to hold a grudge” and I’m still mad about it.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Nike: Just Do It! Me: I don’t want to.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

No matter how weird things seem to get, there’s always an episode of The Twilight Zone that was eerily similar.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m old enough to remember when regular websites were usable.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,688

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

I hope your day is as nice as my ass.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Blood pressure too high to chase these hoes.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Japanese cats answering the phone be like, “Meowshi meowshi.”

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

The main reason for stress is the daily contact with idiots.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

If I was lying down and someone came up and gave me tons of kisses and smooshed my face, I’d love it. I don’t know what my cat’s problem is.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

I’m lazy and chubby. I love food, naps, and coffee. I don’t like Mondays, people, and exercise. I never thought I would grow up to be Garfield.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via X:

You can always tell when someone is on a diet by how they scrape every last bit from that yogurt container.

Going viral on Facebook:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Every morning, the cat watches me make coffee and asks if we can go sit out on the balcony to watch the birds, and every morning I say, yes, of course, let’s.

Breaking via Threads:

The reason I stay up late is because I don’t want my free time to end, and tomorrow to start.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I respectfully ignore DMs because I promise you, I am not your soulmate.

Just shared via YouTube:

My biggest fear is waking up and being in the Renaissance era or something. Imagine having the knowledge of hot dogs but lacking the tools to make them.

Just shared via Twitch:

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

Going viral on Reddit:

A car window made specifically for a dog to stick its head out of is called a sunwoof.

Seen just now on WeChat:

There’s a disgusting pervert at the bar watching pornography over my shoulder.

Just landed via Messenger:

Is it possible to die of horniness? Asking for a friend.

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