72 Funny buy quotes

• I’ve learned the best way to find something that I’ve lost is to buy a replacement one, to make the lost one spontaneously appear.

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  1 week ago

  appear, best, buy, finding, humor, irony, item, learned, lesson, life, life lesson, lost, lost item, problem, problem-solving, replacement, solving, something, spontaneous

• Someone from Facebook Marketplace is coming over to either buy the chairs I have for sale, or to murder me.

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  2 weeks ago

  buy, buyer, chair, chairs, coming, concern, Facebook, Facebook Marketplace, humor, i, marketplace, me, murder, online, online shopping, over, safety, safety concern, sale, shopping, someone

• Netflix had enough cash to buy Warner Bros., but cried poor when we shared passwords with our mom.

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  3 weeks ago

  bros., buy, buyout, cash, corporate, corporate buyout, enough, entertainment, family, irony, mom, Netflix, password, password sharing, passwords, poor, service, shared, sharing, streaming, streaming service, warner, Warner Bros.

• ADHD is when you buy a blender and then make smoothies every day for 2 weeks, and then never make one or even acknowledge your blender ever again.

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  1 month ago

  2, ADHD, again, appliance, blender, buy, day, even, ever, every, forgetfulness, habit, humor, kitchen, kitchen appliance, never, routine, smoothie, weeks

• Whoever said money can’t buy happiness, clearly never paid for a divorce.

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  2 months ago

  buy, divorce, fee, happiness, humor, legal, legal fee, money, never, paid, payment, relationship, said

• Sure, money can’t buy happiness, but it can definitely buy a jet ski… and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?

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  2 months ago

  buy, definitely, ever, fun, happiness, humor, jet, jet ski, joy, luxury, money, person, sad, seen, ski, sport, sure, water, water sport

• My teenager has really expensive taste for someone who can’t afford to buy their own toothpaste.

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  2 months ago

  afford, affordability, buy, expensive, expensive taste, humor, own, parenting, someone, taste, teenager, teenager humor, toothpaste

• Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

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  2 months ago

  buy, clothing, ever, experience, fit, fitting, funny observation, huge, humor, observation, pack, perfectly, personal, personal experience, shopping, size, take, think, try, underwear

• Do you ever stress about money, then accidentally order from Amazon?

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  2 months ago

  accidentally, Amazon, buy, ever, impulse, impulse buy, money, online, online shopping, order, shopping, stress

• My toxic trait is when I’m bored, I start looking for flights to book.

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  2 months ago

  book, booking, bored, boredom, buy, flight, i, impulse, impulse buy, looking, start, toxic, toxic trait, trait, travel

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