Funny carpet quotes

• I would rather walk barefoot across a carpet made out of Legos than go to my high school reunion.

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  1 month ago

  across, avoidance, barefoot, carpet, high, high school reunion, humor, i, Lego, legos, pain, reunion, school, walk

• It’s freaking me out to think of how bad I’d look at the Met Gala.

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  1 month ago

  appearance, bad, carpet, celebrity, event, fashion, gala, humor, ID, insecure, me, met, Met Gala, outfit, red, red carpet, self-deprecating, think

• We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

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  1 month ago

  carpet, cleaned, cleaning, dog, humor, just, pet, throw, throw up, today, waiting

• And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

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  1 month ago

  again, carpet, celebrity, day, disappointment, expectation, guys, humor, once, red, red carpet

• Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

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  1 month ago

  biome, care, carpet, cleaning, home, home care, humor, i, micro, micro biome, natural, never, procrastination, vacuuming

• That incredible ability of cats to only throw up on carpeted floors.

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  1 month ago

  ability, carpet, cat, cats, cleaning, humor, mess, pet, throw, throw up

• Don’t let anyone treat you like a red flag, you’re the whole damn red carpet, baby.

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  1 month ago

  advice, baby, carpet, confidence, empowerment, flag, humor, let, red, red carpet, red flag, relationship, relationship advice, self-worth, treat, whole

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