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procrastination

Funny quotes dye

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Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.

Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

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Technically, the Friday after July 4 isn’t a holiday. But I think we all know that Americans have a constitutional right to take the fifth. - 17 shares on Messenger this week.
They should make a drug that recreates the feeling of having your number called earlier than expected. - 96 shares on LinkedIn this week.
Yeah, I can explain that gap on my resume, I tried to move a picture in Word. - 81 shares on Pinterest this week.
This meeting could have been a pajama party. - 54 shares on X this week.
Parenting sometimes feels like you’re an elevator. Lots of ups and downs and the kids love to push your buttons. - 56 shares on Reddit this week.

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8,315 funny quotes and pics

11,593 funny quotes topics

Updated: Mar 14, 2025

Trending Funny Quotes 🔥

Ugh, those red and blue flashing lights are interfering with my driving and scrolling. - 2 folks are currently viewing this quote.
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My secret talent is turning any situation into a considerably more awkward one. - 7 folks are currently viewing this quote.
No matter how busy my Sunday gets, I always manage to set aside time to panic about Monday. - 9 folks are currently viewing this quote.
I’m at that age where someone can call me the wrong name and I’m just like “whatever, I’ll be Dan for a minute”. - 2 folks are currently viewing this quote.

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