47 Funny fruit quotes

• Me: I have a cut under my fingernail. Universe: Excellent, I will send you an unusually high number of encounters with citrus fruit.

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  1 day ago

  citrus, citrus fruit, cut, encounter, exaggeration, excellent, fingernail, fruit, high, humor, i, injury, me, number, send, under, universe

• Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

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  2 months ago

  apple, apples, bad, blueberry, delicious, disgusting, Doritos, every, food, food humor, fruit, great, humor, inconsistency, know, problem, same, snack, sometimes, taste, time

• Many fruits can be great names… but the real challenge is naming a child after a vegetable….

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  2 months ago

  after, challenge, child, fruit, fruits, great, humor, name, names, naming, real, vegetable

• The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

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  2 months ago

  berry, elderberry, fruit, humor, knowledge, most, wisdom

• I have the patience of a nearly ripe avocado.

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  2 months ago

  analogy, avocado, food, fruit, humor, i, impatience, patience, ripe

• Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

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  2 months ago

  bananas, before, brag, bragging, brown, eating, fruit, healthy, healthy snack, humor, i, jealous, jealousy, self-confidence, snack, turned

• Pomegranates are worth the mess.

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  2 months ago

  activity, fruit, fun, fun activity, humor, mess, pomegranate, worth

• The pumpkin was invented in 1942 when a watermelon put on a pair of corduroys.

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  2 months ago

  1942, absurdity, costume, fruit, humor, invention, joke, playful, pumpkin, put, watermelon, whimsical

• I love how bananas just take over the whole smoothie. You can never dim her light.

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  2 months ago

  banana, bananas, dim, fruit, fun, humor, i, joke, just, light, love, metaphor, never, over, playful, smoothie, take, whole

• People who talk about fruit having too much sugar scare me so bad. Please get back, you wicked witch!

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  2 months ago

  back, bad, fear, fruit, having, humor, me, much, people, please, scare, sugar, talk, too, wicked, witch

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