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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

How many filters does it take before it’s technically a painting?

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, no, I shut it off and back on again. Why are you still here?

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

I have a sundress and no man to bend me over in it, sad day.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in this whirlpool of emotions over there.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Felony Vandalism is a beautiful name for a girl.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Going to a DaBaby concert because I need some alone time, and I know no one else will be there.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

“Topless” doesn’t always mean breasts or a convertible. Sometimes it also means the brain.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

No, I don’t like nature. I can’t respect anything that would so flippantly turn dinosaurs into birds.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Hungry me has no respect for bathroom scale me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,250

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

On my way to HR again for nicknaming my coworker “Mastercard” because they take credit for other people’s work.

Live now on Snapchat:

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Live now on Discord:

When I’m done eating… I have to show my hands to my cat, like I’m a blackjack dealer.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I believe it was Aristotle who once said “The fastest way to get your kids to stop screaming is to also start screaming.”

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Police cars should play ice cream truck music when they’re pulling you over for something minor.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Washing your face is actually multitasking because you are also washing your hands and forearms and shirt and countertop and feet and floor and hair.

Going viral on X:

Elliott didn’t care about E.T. He just wanted a flying bike.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’ll see you in your nightmares.

Funny gender-neutral quotes

Funny gender-neutral quotes bring a burst of laughter 🌈😂 without sticking to old labels or stereotypes! Perfect for anyone who loves clever wordplay and inclusive vibes ✨🤪, these quotes celebrate humor that everyone can enjoy. Whether you’re sharing with friends or spicing up your feed, get ready to smile and giggle with jokes that break the mold and keep things lighthearted and fun! 🎉💬

New funny gender-neutral quotes 👇

All funny gender-neutral quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

44 shares on Snapchat this month:

This entire year has been the Nightmare Before Christmas.

47 shares on Messenger this month:

Tried to pull off a smokey eye, ended up looking like I went three rounds with McGregor.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

If we “talk,” you ain’t single. We’re in a pending relationship. You’re in the cart.

56 shares on Twitch this month:

Ever since I turned 20, someone is always in Japan or Italy. Is it like this forever?

19 shares on Slack this month:

Maybe hot chocolate wants to be called beautiful chocolate at least one time.

73 shares on Reddit this month:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

17 shares on TikTok this month:

The theory that two stacked beds can’t be converted into two regular beds has been debunked.

84 shares on X this month:

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

38 shares on Reddit this month:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Floating on a rock in space, but yeah – 9 to 5 sounds reasonable.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Thank you for the opportunity but I don’t think being human is a good fit for me. I’m going to go back to school to become an octopus.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Are you gonna confess your undying love for me or what, bro?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember before social media you would have to pick up the phone and call someone to tell them how much you love bacon?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Shazam, but for the name of the person who literally just introduced themself to me.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I remember sex. That was cool.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,697

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Airlines when they need to change your flight: here’s a complimentary napkin. Airlines when you need to change your flight: that’ll be $8700.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

They should invent a second airport for people who have been in public before.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Forget Botox. If you really want to look younger, get braces.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

Stop bringing shitty Bluetooth speakers on hikes. No one came to the woods to hear you listen to Katy Perry.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

If Twitter has taught me anything, a lot of us aren’t ready for a spelling bee.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

If we’re not supposed to be snacking late at night why is there a light in the fridge?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

Men make money to be with a woman, but women make money to not have to be with a man. Clock it!

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

If sex was real, I think I would’ve had it by now.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Life is so draining, you fix one problem, here come 12 more.

Making waves on WeChat:

Ever since I was young, I wanted to check my email for a verification code.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I need someone to peer pressure me into doing things.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

“Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have” is all well and good until you’re rocking a tutu.

Going viral on Facebook:

Cholesterol has a special place in my heart.

Freshly posted on Slack:

The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.

Spotted on Threads:

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Gave my family the wrong address for our beach rental. Hoping to get a couple days in before they find me.

Live now on Twitch:

Since I’ve stayed away from most people, I get on much better with people.

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