Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Whoever salts the fries at McDonald’s needs to come do the roads.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched the argument I baited you with.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

I like warm weather but only to a certain degree.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Mothers be doing unnecessary housework and then get mad at you when they’re tired.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

I’m sorry I mistook all our laughs, long nights, sweet texts, and inside jokes as you caring. I’ll think twice before wasting my time again.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Daylight savings is not enough. You need to be daylight investing.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Might mess around and reply, “That sounds like a you problem,” to every work email today.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Everybody is fighting a battle that you don’t know about, because of the first rule of Fight Club.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Tip on how best to start a conversation with me: Not at all.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,664

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on X:

This weekend was so busy, I hardly had time to sit around in my pajamas and doom scroll.

Live now on X:

Twitter is cigarette for the eyes.

Just shared via Reddit:

One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

Just landed via Threads:

Everybody’s back hurts until it’s time to have sexy time.

Trending via WeChat:

My goal weight is getting a magician to saw me in half.

Breaking via YouTube:

Please go out, have fun, have friends, make connections. That mysterious lifestyle won’t save you.

Just landed via TikTok:

If I walk into a girl’s house and she got like 50 plants, I know she’s a keeper because she already takes care of a bunch of useless things. What’s one more?

Seen just now on TikTok:

You should be able to donate somebody else’s body to science.

Making waves on WeChat:

There should be an Amazon driver at the Mall during the holidays so adults can sit on their lap and tell them what they want.

Just landed via Slack:

My body feels like it’s aging in dog years.

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All funny Gotham City quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on WeChat this month:

You’d be surprised how many times you can use the word succulent in a work email.

77 shares on Pinterest this month:

“What’s your blood type?” I don’t know, boiling!

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Late replies don’t bother me. As long as we’re not in love, or you don’t owe me money, take your time.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

If she replies to your sarcasm with more sarcasm, that’s a whole life.

19 shares on Twitch this month:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, so make sure you tell bad people they’re bad.

16 shares on Pinterest this month:

The feminine urge to turn you on and not do anything about it.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

I love it when my dog suddenly gets up and goes to another part of the house. Did you just remember you left the stove on or something?

78 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

42 shares on X this month:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here hating myself.

36 shares on Slack this month:

Stop bringing shitty Bluetooth speakers on hikes. No one came to the woods to hear you listen to Katy Perry.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish men had sluttier outfit options. Because why am I in a mini skirt, and you’re in a quarter zip?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My only chance at a big house in the country is if I become a rescue dog.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve decided that my 20s are actually from 25 – 35.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate lying to my parents but it’s for their own good.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Tell your dog I said woof woof.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t flirt with me. I’ll show up at your house and start eating all your snacks.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Being married means mostly shouting “What?” from other rooms.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Just got my test results back and my cholesterol level is a cheese bratwurst.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

That beeping of the parking assistant when you get too close to other cars. I’d like that for people.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,597

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Missed garbage day today, if you’re looking for a bad boy that doesn’t play by the rules.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

That awkward moment you can’t understand what somebody is saying after they have repeated it about five times.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

They should invent a day where it all works out.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Blocking him isn’t enough. I need to watch his hairline recede.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by saying they look tired.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

My husband clearly believes that chairs just magically push themselves back in.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Rudolph, with your nose so bright, help me find my phone tonight.

Making waves on Facebook:

This generation of men makes celibacy so easy for women.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

Spotted on Reddit:

A 12 step program but it’s just me getting off the couch.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

Just landed via Pinterest:

When you have the money, you can go a whole day without eating. But when you’re broke, the dizziness starts at 6 a.m.

Trending via Discord:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

Freshly posted on Discord:

I’m actually really peace-loving, but then there are other people.

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