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Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

At the airport, and a wife asked her husband, “Where are our seats?” and he responds, “In the airplane.”

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I never wanted to download the Microsoft Authenticator app on my personal phone to access every professional platform necessary to do my job.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

I can’t wait to go to bed, get terrible sleep, and wake up exhausted with a sore back.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

It’s a good thing that not everyone has a smartphone. We also need people who honk when the lights turn green.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Sex is great, but have you ever had your alarm go off and then realize you don’t have to get up today?

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

I love being outside, just not when it’s too cold or too hot or too wet or too windy or if there are bugs.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

When I get married, I want my wedding video to be filmed like it’s an episode of The Office. I want camera zooms, eye contact, side commentary— all of it.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

There are advantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it. There are disadvantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it.

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Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

When someone says “I don’t want a relationship right now” the “at least not with you” is silent.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Typos keep me humble. Every email is a gamble.

Making waves on Pinterest:

(at an incredibly low point in my life) I should start dating again.

Making waves on Slack:

All I’m saying is, there are too many songs about love and not enough songs about evenly layered nachos.

Making waves on Discord:

There’s no bigger test of patience than typing your email address in on a TV with the remote.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I’m now at the age where sitting cross-legged on the floor is punishable by about three days of full-body paralysis.

Spotted on Reddit:

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Anxiety should have a loyalty rewards program.

Going bananas on Telegram:

The lion doesn’t concern himself with credit card debt.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I used to eat my feelings but now it’s so expensive, I might as well go to therapy.

Funny mis-match quotes

New funny mis-match quotes 👇

Wanna come over and see my mis-matched sock collection?

1 week ago

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All funny mis-match quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sunday is proof that time travel exists, because it was just Friday.

74 shares on Threads this month:

I’d pretend to care about football for you.

77 shares on Slack this month:

Men used to smoke Marlboros. Now they cry when they lose their strawberry cheesecake vape.

28 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m an adult, that’s why I can have Skittles for dinner.

73 shares on Slack this month:

Maybe Monday is more scared of us than we are of it… we don’t know.

85 shares on Messenger this month:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

32 shares on Slack this month:

Being loved right feels like telepathy and a little bit of witchcraft.

56 shares on Threads this month:

After my death, I’ll be very busy. The list of people to whom I want to appear as a ghost is getting longer every day.

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

To everyone I’ve wronged this year. Next year same time, same place.

31 shares on WhatsApp this month:

That fight could’ve been an email.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

I’ve got 50 minutes to make it look like I’ve been flossing for the last 6 months.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Mondays have a black belt in psychological warfare.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

I’m going spiraling, do you need anything?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Bro, did you really just mix up e.g. and i.e. in front of the hoes?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

“You are what you eat”. I don’t remember eating a huge disappointment.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Santa doesn’t check the naughty list anymore, he just checks social media.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

You should be able to google why a couple broke up.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Sorry I slowed down but I had to calculate if the bridge could hold the weight of my car with all the stuffed animals my kids insisted on bringing on vacation.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Call me a glitch, cause I’m definitely messing with your system.

Seen just now on Reddit:

January feels like a schizophrenic episode.

Trending via WeChat:

Funny thing about zombie movies – they never seem to go after the cameraman.

Shared recently on YouTube:

This Monday has Monday written all over it.

Going viral on WeChat:

Why socialize when you could party inside your room with your 10+ personalities?

Just shared via Twitch:

My father didn’t want kids, so he had two kids, which was the equivalent of zero kids at the time.

Broadcasted on Discord:

The real morning people are the ones that wake up to call radio stations.

Live now on Reddit:

I noticed my mouse problem is back an I yelled at my cats for being lazy and not doing their job, like I was in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.

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Funny mis-match quotes

New funny mis-match quotes 👇

Wanna come over and see my mis-matched sock collection?

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