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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log âœĻ

Someone from ðŸ‡ŪðŸ‡đ has copied:

This whole working for a living thing goes on for how long?

Someone from ðŸ‡ąðŸ‡ļ has viewed:

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

Someone from 🇎ðŸ‡ģ has shared:

I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

Someone from 🇰🇞 has viewed:

I cannot definitively say, even after all I’ve seen, that I would not visit Jurassic Park.

Someone from ðŸ‡ĩðŸ‡ū has downloaded:

Stretching my back isn’t enough; I need to take out my spine and wring it out like a towel.

Someone from ðŸ‡ĩðŸ‡ū has shared:

I would never put up a lost dog poster. I’m not letting the whole neighborhood know I fumbled.

Someone from ðŸ‡ŪðŸ‡ļ has bookmarked:

Two sheep walk into a baaaaa.

Someone from ðŸ‡ēðŸ‡ē has bookmarked:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Someone from ðŸ‡ĩ🇞 has bookmarked:

It’s Mother’s Day Eve so remember to leave out a bottle of wine for Mom when she comes down the chimney.

Someone from ðŸ‡ĶðŸ‡ļ has downloaded:

You don’t see people giving bunny ears in photos anymore.

Funny Quotes Data ðŸĪ“

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

14 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

Social Media Log ðŸ’Ŧ

Trending via Pinterest:

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Maturity is when you realize money can actually buy happiness.

Live now on WeChat:

People argue with me more in my head than they do in real life.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

You should be able to google what someone said to you at the bar last night.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Welcome to your 40s, your level of cleaning is directly related to whether your guest can see without readers.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

True luxury is sleeping until you wake up by yourself.

Going viral on Instagram:

Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Roses are red. Blue got me thinking. I reckon it’s time for some excessive day drinking…

Going viral on YouTube:

I was googling the best time to visit Italy. It is when you have money.

Spotted on Snapchat:

The masculine urge to make a woman sit through a YouTube video that she will not find funny or entertaining.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌ïļ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂ðŸ’Ĩ

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data ðŸĪ“

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

14 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log âœĻ

Someone from 🇰🇎 has bookmarked:

I used to have a great future in my past.

Someone from ðŸ‡ąðŸ‡Ķ has viewed:

Perhaps an evening in the meditation cage will soothe you.

Someone from 🇧ðŸ‡ŋ has bookmarked:

I need to go to jail for a while to catch up on all my reading.

Someone from ðŸ‡ĶðŸ‡ą has copied:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Someone from 🇚ðŸ‡Ķ has copied:

“Hey you!” is short for “I have no idea what your name is.”

Someone from 🇰🇊 has downloaded:

Can I come over and circle you like a vulture?

Someone from ðŸ‡ŪðŸ‡ļ has downloaded:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again because I have a terrible memory.

Someone from ðŸ‡ēðŸ‡Ķ has viewed:

I overthink, therefore I am.

Someone from ðŸ‡ļðŸ‡ą has shared:

I told my GPS I needed direction in life, and now it insists on recalculating every hour.

Someone from ðŸ‡ģ🇎 has viewed:

Hate it when my alarm goes off in the morning, and I’m still alive.

Social Media Log ðŸ’Ŧ

Going viral on Pinterest:

Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

Trending via Telegram:

‘You’re going to die alone!’ Okay, when did dying become a group project?

Going viral on Messenger:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Just landed via Reddit:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

This is my emotional support online shopping cart.

Trending via X:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Reported on Slack:

If you aren’t sleeping with me, then you’re sleeping against me.

Making waves on Telegram:

My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.

Reported on Discord:

“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I grew up ugly, so I had to be funny, and then got hot in my twenties, so that’s how I became perfect.

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