Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • No, I don’t comment, I voodoo doll like a real adult.
  • The bad news is there was a lot of turbulence on my flight this morning. The good news is my phone counted it as steps.
  • My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.
  • The Jaws theme stays on during sex.
  • Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.
  • As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!