Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.
  • I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.
  • People always love to claim that a celebrity’s death is “unexpected”, but they never actually release the data on which celebrities they expected to die that day.
  • I can easily spot a wolf in sheep’s clothing but this guy was dressed like my grandmother which threw me off.
  • In an alternate universe, the hard way is always learning me.
  • Asking Santa Claus for nudes.