Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Y’all need to stop marrying people who look just like you do but with a wig on.
  • There are drug-sniffing dogs, guide dogs, dogs that save lives. And then there’s my dog, who hits the lead when he poops.
  • My goal weight is getting a magician to saw me in half.
  • You’d think the heat and humidity would steam some of the wrinkles out of my body.
  • Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.
  • Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.