I make her eyes roll back. Not in bed though. I’m just annoying.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

A big part of my wife’s cardio routine is rolling away from me in bed.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

When I eat rotisserie chicken, I like to pretend that I’m performing an autopsy.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

I was born a boy, but according to the packaging, I identify as a family of four.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Donuts hug you from the inside.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

Mister Sandman, bring me a meme. Make it the dumbest shit that I’ve ever seen.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Anything is free if you can outrun security. The more you know.