Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

The difference between the Olympic village and a normal village is that not everyone in the Olympic village is related to each other.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

I was thinking of becoming self employed, but due to cutbacks, I can’t afford to hire me right now.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Times New Roman never did anything to anybody. It was a real trooper. Then society unceremoniously dethroned it.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Today, I want to talk about how people’s houses smell funny, but mine doesn’t.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

Until further notice the days of the week are now called thisday, thatday, otherday, someday, yesterday, today and nextday!

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

I wonder how my close personal beloved friend Taylor Swift is doing today.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, I’m not reading a text; I’m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

What’s my net worth? Buddy, I don’t own a net.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 20, 2026

3,329

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

Architects should try and design a house with no yelling.

Making waves on Reddit:

I wish I could be as excited about being awake as my dog is about me being awake.

Trending via Twitch:

Spotify Wrapped isn’t enough, I want an Excel spreadsheet of my listening habits.

Just shared via Reddit:

Having an exorcism, but only because the demon requested it.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Tornados are just a bunch of ghosts fighting over a cow.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

Spotted on Pinterest:

The more nicknames I have for you, the more I like you.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Every weekend has two days: Saturday and It’s Monday Tomorrow.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Might lay here until someone draws my chalk outline.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I’ll be like “I’m fine” then shake my leg at 150 mph.

I never forget to eat, but I do eat to forget.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, the classic case of emotional eating meets forgetfulness! 🍔🤦‍♂️ Who needs therapy when there's a fridge full of comfort food, right? 🍕🙈 Just remember, a moment on the lips, forever on the hips! 🍦🍑 #FoodForThought

eat, food, forget, humor, i, memory, never

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on TikTok this month:

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

77 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Monday holds the record for being the worst day of the week.

14 shares on Twitch this month:

There will never be a perfect time. Make that mistake now.

10 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My therapist says he can’t take any more of my talk and that I should join a group. So, here I am.

20 shares on Facebook this month:

Rise and grind your teeth gently while ruminating over every past mistake.

15 shares on Facebook this month:

Just paid my bills, so don’t ask me to come out. I’m at home getting my money’s worth.

53 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The concept of hot water showers feeling so good but not actually being good for your hair or skin is disgusting.

74 shares on TikTok this month:

Have your guardian angel call my guardian angel.

96 shares on Instagram this month:

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not like other teenagers, I’m 51.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The best essential oils are the ones that drip out of Tacos.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Please pray for my husband, he’s struggling to find me.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating apps aren’t working. I’ll see ya at Home Depot, gentlemen.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

You say “multitask” like it’s a good thing.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,430

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

The answer is a cabin in the woods, by the way.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

For Christmas, I’d like to be understood.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

I actually do check to see if you told me happy birthday before I tell you.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

“I’m not jealous of nobody but stay-at-home wives who are married to wealthy men.”

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

I talk a lot of shit for someone who is startled by my own toast popping up while I’m watching it. Every. Single. Time.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

“You look tired!” Bro, I want to stop existing.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Born to be a hater, forced to understand your perspective.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

I’m not shy, I’m holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

I only obey the traffic rules to get on other peoples’ nerves.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Why is everyone looking for intelligent life in space? Can we please start on Earth first?

Making waves on Discord:

Some things are better left alone, like me, for instance.

Live now on TikTok:

They said I can never go back to that Vietnamese spot. They banh mi pho life.

Breaking via Discord:

A woman’s G-spot can be found at the end of the word shopping.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I think I’m about six months away from the perfect ‘before’ picture.

Just shared via Discord:

I’m not drinking 2% milk until we figure out what the other 98% is.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

If this meeting were any slower, it’d be a landscape painting.

Going viral on TikTok:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Imagine hating me and I’m just here trying to push a door that says pull.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.

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