Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to cancel my appointment at a sperm bank. I will just call them and say I can’t come.
  • The idiot’s diet is just biting your tongue.
  • The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.
  • You haven’t experienced proper anger until you have a sister.
  • Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
  • Welcome to your 40s: you’re not exhausted, that’s just your face now.