Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Oh, sweet love! 🍫💕 May your relationship be as deeply indulgent and full of satisfaction as a slice of chocolate cake. Just remember, a little extra sweetness never hurt anyone! 😉🍰 #RelationshipGoals"

cake, chocolate, craving, desire, food, humor, i, love, me, relationship, romance, same, someone, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Friends with no kids are like: Want to go to New Zealand this Friday?

0

2 months ago

adventure, Friday, friends, kids, new, New Zealand, spontaneity, travel, want, weekend, Zealand
My CV is so good, companies are still reading it for 9 months.

0

3 months ago

9, company, CV, exaggeration, good, humor, job, job search, months, nine, nine months, reading, resume, search, still
Don’t go keto, go pirate. Rum, fish and beef jerky diet.

0

2 months ago

adventure, beef, beef jerky, diet, fish, food, humor, jerky, keto, lifestyle, pirate, rum
What happened to the huge corporate Christmas parties you see in all the ’90s movies? Seems like that doesn’t exist at all anymore.

0

2 weeks ago

90s, 90s movie, Christmas, Christmas party, corporate, corporate party, culture, exist, holiday, holiday party, huge, movie, nostalgia, office, office culture, party, seems
Not photogenic, but I probably look soooo good as a distant memory.

0

4 months ago

appearance, distant, good, humor, i, memory, nostalgia, photogenic, self-deprecating
My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

0

2 months ago

card, frustration, gift, gift card, give, humor, left, limits, metaphor, much, patience, sure, try, uncertainty

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

33 shares on Threads this month:

“It’s not that deep.” Of course it’s not. With a shallow mind like yours, nothing ever is.

60 shares on WeChat this month:

Nothing bores me like twins who don’t look alike, you should’ve just dropped later if you’re not going to participate.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

I can be social. Today I meowed at my cat and he meowed back.

32 shares on X this month:

The fine art of sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong.

57 shares on TikTok this month:

There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your five best friends and ten dogs.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

Can’t threaten me with screenshots. I’ll get a microphone and say it again.

79 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Every word wishes it could sound as fun as falafel.

38 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you respond to emails and Teams messages quickly, you can get away with basically anything at work.

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?

91 shares on Pinterest this month:

Want to know what someone is really like? Play Monopoly with them.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

I’m at the age where drinking a cup of coffee now makes me feel like Popeye scarfing down a can of spinach.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Bartender asked me to give his place a one-star Google review to keep the vibe lowkey. Insane method.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Happiness is when you really have nothing to do with people you want absolutely nothing to do with.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

My wife rearranged the kitchen cabinets, and now I’ll never eat again.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

You can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, let them sip on their own bland brew.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

I have consumed so much potato salad the last couple of days, I’m sweating mayo.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

They should invent a brain that doesn’t whisper bad things to you.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

Going bananas on Instagram:

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where they’re coming from.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

Spotted on Facebook:

The thumbs up emoji is a nice way to tell someone not only did you receive their message, you’re also done with the conversation.

Spotted on Instagram:

If it doesn’t get a like in the first two years, I delete it.

Going viral on X:

I’m surviving motherhood, one teenage meltdown at a time.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Getting out of bed should count as resistance training.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I bought all this healthy food at the grocery store today and now I’m trying to decide if I want Chinese food or pizza delivered for dinner tonight.

Trending via TikTok:

My credit score is a family of raccoons hissing over a McRib.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Friends with no kids are like: Want to go to New Zealand this Friday?

My CV is so good, companies are still reading it for 9 months.

Don’t go keto, go pirate. Rum, fish and beef jerky diet.

What happened to the huge corporate Christmas parties you see in all the ’90s movies? Seems like that doesn’t exist at all anymore.

Not photogenic, but I probably look soooo good as a distant memory.

My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨