Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it.
  • There’s no one I respect more than duck hunters. You spent $15,000 on a camouflage boat to outsmart a duck.
  • Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.
  • The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.
  • Them: I haven’t seen you in a long time. Me: You’re welcome.
  • They should have made a pool raft that looked like a broken door when Titanic was in theaters. I bet it would have sold millions.