Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the power of optimism and selective perception! 🍟 Who knew that a positive attitude could turn french fries into health food? 😂 Just imagine the possibilities if we applied this logic to other foods…"

bad, diet, food, french, french fry, fry, humor, i, me, optimism, optimistic, positivity, self-deception, told

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on Instagram this month:

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

19 shares on Messenger this month:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

26 shares on Slack this month:

I need you to put the fun in refund!

49 shares on YouTube this month:

There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

76 shares on Messenger this month:

Every triangle is a love triangle when you love triangles.

60 shares on Telegram this month:

Shout out to the dude who flipped me off in traffic. Making me feel all nostalgic for California, thank you.

96 shares on Pinterest this month:

The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

45 shares on Instagram this month:

Babies will literally step on your face just to grab what they want.

26 shares on LinkedIn this month:

One thing about me is I don’t even need to get drunk to act a fool.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Some people are like “I’m a people pleaser,” and not a single person is pleased with them.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

I need someone to peer pressure me into doing things.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

The cold water does not get warmer if you jump late.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

When people suck the life out of you, they should take some fat too.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Dear algorithm, only show this post to the most attractive and successful people.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

I didn’t forget about you; my algorithm did.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

Home is where you can walk around like a bum.

Trending via Messenger:

Forget Botox. If you really want to look younger, get braces.

Just landed via Discord:

Roman soldiers are all like “I’m going to fight you in this short yet tasteful leather skirt.”

Trending via Slack:

Unfortunately, when you don’t burden people with your problems, they assume you don’t have any. Lol.

Just shared via Twitch:

Well, I’ve been depressed and poor, but sure, we’ll call it intermittent fasting.

Trending via Slack:

Some people come into your life to remind you why you don’t wanna let anyone into your life.

Going viral on Messenger:

It’s so unfair that saying “xd” is still socially acceptable, but only if you’re speaking Spanish.

Broadcasted on X:

I wanna marry someone funnier than me, but sadly, I am the funniest.

Spotted on Messenger:

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Please go out, have fun, have friends, make connections. That mysterious lifestyle won’t save you.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I was told to be more optimistic so I’ve decided french fries aren’t bad for me.

People always ask me “Do you believe in God?” and I say of course it’s important to have self-belief.

Public urination isn’t a crime if you do it in your pants.

Be the one that gets asked to remove the hockey mask, during a conference call, on Friday the 13th.

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

My save-for-later cart on Amazon is up to about $1.5 million dollars.

Going on dates is hard because do I like them or do I just have sooo much fun being me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I was told to be more optimistic so I’ve decided french fries aren’t bad for me.

Keep the laugh going 😂

People always ask me “Do you believe in God?” and I say of course it’s important to have self-belief.

Public urination isn’t a crime if you do it in your pants.

Be the one that gets asked to remove the hockey mask, during a conference call, on Friday the 13th.

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

My save-for-later cart on Amazon is up to about $1.5 million dollars.

Going on dates is hard because do I like them or do I just have sooo much fun being me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨