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Well, technically, you would probably just attract a lot of metal objects… and maybe some confused looks! 💁‍♂️🧲 Just remember, being magnetic in personality is way more appealing than being magnetic in taste! 😉

attraction, attractive, eat, humor, i, joke, magnet, playful, question

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Maybe the four horsemen of the apocalypse are Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

3 months ago
apocalypse, Facebook, four, horseman, horsemen, humor, Instagram, joke, maybe, media, social, social media, TikTok, Twitter
The human body is incredible. It’s like, “Oh, you’re stressed and sad? Here, enjoy this acne.”

1 month ago
acne, body, emotion, enjoy, health, here, human, human body, humor, incredible, oh, sad, sadness, skin, stress
Chuck Norris passed his driving test on foot.

1 month ago
absurdity, chuck, Chuck Norris, driving, driving test, foot, humor, joke, legend, norris, skills, test
Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

1 month ago
bottle, disaster, fridge, fridge spill, frustration, humorous, humorous frustration, kitchen, kitchen disaster, kitchen mess, mess, over, sauce, spill, unpronounceable, worcestershire, Worcestershire sauce
Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

1 month ago
competition, contest, cream, dessert, eating, eating contest, humor, hurt, ice, ice cream, playful, playful teasing, teasing, yours
Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

1 month ago
always, casual, fashion, favorite, humor, outfit, outfits, relationship, shirt, underwear

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.

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My favorite pastime is staying up way later than I should and complaining the next day about how tired I am.

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When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

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I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

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I don’t think I’ve ever made the right amount of pasta.

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Friendly reminder to drink your water and mind your business this week.

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Y’all be riding them bikes in the street like I don’t gotta look up my next song.

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Just landed via YouTube:

Not to brag, but I drove and found a place I was looking for without turning down my music today.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Teach a man to fish, and he will eat for a lifetime. Teach your kid about stingrays, and he will pretend to sting you all afternoon.

Trending via Pinterest:

Some of these fake tans look like an old Tupperware container that’s had marinara sauce in it.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I didn’t like my beard at first… then it grew on me.

Trending via Pinterest:

My friends have canceled our dinner plans two nights in a row. I’m starting to think they don’t like dinner.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Being late to work should never be that serious. At least I came?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.

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If I eat a magnet, will I become more attractive?

The human body is incredible. It’s like, “Oh, you’re stressed and sad? Here, enjoy this acne.”

Chuck Norris passed his driving test on foot.

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Nobody talks about the privilege of having a friend who shows interest in your hyperfixations.

Not to brag, but I just stood up without making a sound. Don’t be jealous.

I don’t argue with idiots on the Internet, I just keep scrolling and mind my own business.

If you turn your phone off for 1 day, you’ll realize it’s still 2007 outside.

Theo Von’s entire life is like a raccoon that visits New York City.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

If you ever feel like a failure, just remember, Domino’s tried to open pizza chains in Italy.

Born to hate people. Somehow ended up in customer service.

If you think I’m evil, wait until you meet the man who made me this way.

I’ve come to the conclusion that my guardian angel is very possessive about me.

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Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

On Halloween, I’ll be handing out full size bars of really bad advice. Only while supplies last.

When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying ‘Haven’t decided yet’ is typically a good response.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Sometimes, I feel like my brain is still running on Windows 95.

Women do not snore. The sound they make at night is just the rewinding of the vocal cords.

I think it’s sad that getting married is one of the only ways to guarantee somebody will be forced to make a speech about how great you are.

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

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If I eat a magnet, will I become more attractive?

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Maybe the four horsemen of the apocalypse are Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

The human body is incredible. It’s like, “Oh, you’re stressed and sad? Here, enjoy this acne.”

Chuck Norris passed his driving test on foot.

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

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