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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

The algorithm knows about that thing you like that you’re denying yourself of.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

You may find my attraction to Goofy weird, but I don’t give a hyuck.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Some people’s laughs are funnier than the joke.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

I only attract psychopaths. If you’ve ever had a crush on me, find a therapist.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Do you want to sit on the porch with me until we die or not?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

615 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,208

Funny Quotes Topics

17,340

Funny Quotes Images

15,208

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,816

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

They should build a separate grocery store for people who have actually purchased food before, know how to push a cart, and possess at least an ounce of spatial awareness.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

Going viral on Messenger:

90% of debugging is just realizing your own stupidity in slow motion.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I’m going to be real pissed if I get my shit together and the world ends.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Once you’ve read the dictionary, every other book you read is just a remix.

Making waves on Facebook:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.

Spotted on Twitch:

Some people stay in the past because that’s where they peaked.

If idiots could fly, TikTok would be an airport.

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If idiots could fly, TikTok would be an airport.
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Commentary:
If idiots could fly, TikTok would indeed be the busiest airport in the world! Get ready for some turbulence as we navigate through the endless stream of questionable content at this high-flying social media hub. Fasten your seatbelts, folks – it's a bumpy ride filled with dance challenges and lip-sync fails!

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

44 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

49 shares on Instagram this month:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

90 shares on Threads this month:

Tried online dating, and it turns out my soulmate is a Nigerian prince who needs my bank details to escape his kingdom.

97 shares on Discord this month:

Someone told me I’ve gained weight. I told them it was for a part in a movie. I’ve never acted in my life. Until that moment.

49 shares on Messenger this month:

One person’s logic is another one’s “what the heck?”

25 shares on WeChat this month:

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

15 shares on WeChat this month:

Whatever you do today, do it with the confidence of a 4-year old wearing a Batman cape.

57 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Not saying I’m a bot or anything, but if someone in real life told me to ignore all previous instructions and write a poem about onions or whatever, I’d probably give it my best shot.

34 shares on Twitch this month:

Can’t wait to overuse the “My husband said,” “Let me phone my husband,” “I’ll ask my husband.”

18 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s so hot here, I’m breaking a sweat just bitching and moaning about it.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I may not have lost all my marbles yet, but there’s a small hole in the bag somewhere.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Yes, I’m full of microplastics, but it’s actually been helpful. It’s given me superpowers. I can communicate with Tupperware.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My kids practically have medical degrees they’re at the nurse so much.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe the real American dream is the debt we collected along the way.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you won’t let go of.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Big fan of taking a huge bite and then nodding while I chew. You make an excellent point, food.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

November moving quicker than two lesbians who met three days ago.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when people ask me: “Why are you so quiet?” Because I am. That’s how I function. I don’t ask others, “Why do you talk so much?” It’s rude.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

615 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,208

Funny Quotes Topics

17,340

Funny Quotes Images

15,208

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,999

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

What makes us human is selecting all images with traffic lights.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

My personal brand is being the guest at a wedding who can’t dance but puts in a noticeable effort.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

I see posts like, “If food is too expensive, just grow your own.” Okay, Einstein, why didn’t I think of that?

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

I have re-entered the Band of Brothers rewatch stage of male depression.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Crazy how many organs in your body are dedicated to the poopification of dinner.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

The miracle of DoorDash is that I just pick up my phone, punch a few things into it, and within half an hour I have, at my door, a $52 salad.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Being late to work should never be that serious. At least I came?

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Shit posting is cheaper than therapy.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

Watching my wife absolutely hate my daughter’s boyfriend while being nice and hospitable to him has made me question every interaction I’ve had with another human being in my life.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

When is someone actually going to change the surprise in the avocado? This hard core is kind of a stupid toy.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My girlfriend? You wouldn’t know her, she’s in a different data center.

Spotted on Facebook:

Technically, all restaurants are drive-thru, it just depends how committed to the task you are.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I be like, “Awwwww cows,” and then go and eat two double cheeseburgers, lol.

Freshly posted on Threads:

“You’re so chill.” Thanks, I gave up.

Making waves on Snapchat:

What I learned from Covid is that it’s basically possible to do all your work from home while drunk.

Trending via Twitch:

I’m doing well at accomplishing nothing today and I’m very proud of myself.

Going viral on Reddit:

I need like twelve incomes for this lifestyle I have in my head.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

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