Trendy Funny Quotes

  • *Googles: How to fake your own death and erase existence before 9am Monday morning.
  • Marriage is 33.3% hiding to eat snacks because you and your spouse are supposed to be on a diet.
  • Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.
  • What a lot of people don’t understand about mountain climbing is: don’t do that!
  • When you wish you could tell someone that won’t stop talking “Okay, we’re out of time today”, just like a therapist.
  • The first person to see a peacock spread his tail probably had a heart attack.