Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

I don’t understand my wardrobe. It’s full, but I don’t have clothes.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

We are all monsters searching for someone to share our lives with.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

No one flirts better than a guy who’s not interested in you.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

“I’m pretty good with money unless I leave my house or have access to the internet.”

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Bugs Bunny was my introduction to opera. Can’t say I’ve kept up with it much since.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

I still can’t believe Aldi sells shopping carts for 25 cents. I’ve got 8 of them now and don’t really even have a use for them, it was just too good of a deal to pass up.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Love when people summon Grok and there’s no reply. He just doesn’t care sometimes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

295 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,564

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,564

Jan 11, 2026

3,298

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I think we should all try to spend more time online. It seems to be helping society.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

The real anti-aging regimen is retaining your childlike wonder and whimsy.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I really hope my house is haunted and not in need of structural repairs.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

My ideal man is a kindhearted little freak.

Seen just now on Twitch:

We get it, comma, you went to Oxford.

Spotted on Pinterest:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

Seen just now on Threads:

If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

It’s obvious now that democracy is a busted flush and that in future politicians should be selected via several rigorous rounds of Taskmaster.

2 months ago

It’s obvious now that democracy is a busted flush and that in future politicians should be selected via several rigorous rounds of Taskmaster.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Democracy might be feeling a bit flushed lately… 💸🚽 But hey, who needs voting when we can have politicians battle it out Taskmaster-style? 🏆💪 Who can balance the budget while wearing a chicken suit? 💸🐔 #TaskmasterElections"

competition, democracy, entertainment, flush, future, governance, humor, obvious, politicians, satire, selection, should, Taskmaster

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m actually breaking generational curses by surviving my 20s without marrying a man who hates me.

2 months ago

20s, actually, breaking, curse, empowerment, generational, generational curse, hate, independence, man, marry, me, self-love, survive
Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

2 months ago

application, ask, company, confusion, employment, humor, irony, job, online, open, open position, position, positions, post, recruitment
I am not “quiet quitting”, I am suffering from third-degree burnout.

2 months ago

am, burnout, fatigue, humor, i, quiet, quiet quitting, quitting, stress, suffering, work
Boxes of pasta don’t need a plastic window. I believe pasta is in the box.

2 months ago

believe, box, food, grocery, humor, i, need, packaging, pasta, plastic, plastic window, sarcasm, window
People complain about jury duty as if listening to true crime all day and being sequestered at night isn’t secretly every mother’s fantasy.

2 months ago

being, complain, complaint, crime, day, duty, every, fantasy, humor, jury, jury duty, listening, mother, night, people, sequester, true, true crime
Girls Just Want To Have Naan

2 months ago

cravings, food, fun, girls, humor, just, naan, play, play on words, pun, want, words

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

33 shares on Messenger this month:

My sister: snowboards. My brother: skateboards. Me: charcuterie boards.

89 shares on Instagram this month:

If the math problems are too difficult for me, I post them online and write: “Only 1 in 10 can solve this problem.”

79 shares on Snapchat this month:

Wait… if you’re circling back and I’m touching base, who the hell is monitoring the situation?

87 shares on Slack this month:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

95 shares on YouTube this month:

Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

85 shares on Facebook this month:

Never quit, unless it’s too hard.

95 shares on Instagram this month:

Zombies started running in movies and life has been chaotic since.

85 shares on Threads this month:

So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?

40 shares on Telegram this month:

Animals are so crazy because, why is your mom only one year older than you?

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re under the weather?” We all are, idiot. It’s in the sky.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when people set alarms and it wakes up everybody except for them.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Fact: WhatsApp is the most boring app if you’re single.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

What do you mean a baguette isn’t a female bag?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing ruins my day quite like getting out of bed and dealing with people.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I bet the inventor of the cannon would be relieved to know that they’re mostly about t-shirts now.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Outside letting mosquitoes get some of this.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not fat. I’m just easy to see.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

295 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,564

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,564

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,501

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Traumatized people will navigate emergency situations with calm surety but then have an anxiety attack in a grocery store.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I hate when people ask me, “What did you do today?” Like, buddy, listen, I woke up at noon and then it was five p.m., okay? I don’t know.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

I am so full of love and anger, like a lava lamp.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Too shy for influencing. Too dumb for crypto. Too honest for a scam. Too lazy for 9-5. How can I make money?

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

No, no, I’m listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

It’s interesting growing up and learning that most adults are not smart. I had my suspicions as a kid, but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

I don’t wanna brag, but my posts are unpopular on all continents.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

It’s with a heavy heart and a deep sadness that I have to announce that I’m at work.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Post beach shower is undefeated. Greatest feeling a human could experience. Throw a nap in there, and you will never touch serenity so close.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I wonder how biology explains that pain in your chest you get when you found out your partner cheated on you.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I did not spend years turning the faucet off while I brushed my teeth, so corporations could ruin the environment with festering AI slop.

Live now on Snapchat:

Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Waiting until 4:59 p.m. on Fridays to send an email, because any response is Monday’s problem.

Broadcasted on X:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Breaking via WeChat:

Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

iPad PR is so crazy because you think you absolutely need one until you get it.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Do people with lip filler know that they look like that?

Going viral on WhatsApp:

If there’s no open mouth cougher on the plane they hold the flight until they can find one.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴