Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Me, in heaven: 🌥️ 'Excuse me, could you snap a quick pic of me casually perched on that fluffy cloud over there? It's just for my Insta feed, no biggie.' 😇📸 #CloudNineGoals"

activity, cloud, fun, heaven, me, photo, sitting, take

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

0

2 months ago

anxiety, fear, film, flashlight, health, horror, horror film, humor, mental, mental health, reliability
I see WWIII is about to kick off again. I’d best cancel the milk and get the cat in.

0

2 months ago

again, best, cancel, cat, humor, i, ID, irony, kick, milk, preparation, urgency, WWIII
Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

0

2 months ago

communication, digital, humor, i, impulsive, media, messaging, press, psycho, reaction, read, send, social, social media, sometimes, text, think
I have one of those metal briefcases handcuffed to my wrist, and inside… my grandmother’s meatloaf recipe.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, comedy, family, grandmother, humor, i, joke, meatloaf, metal, playful, quirky, recipe, wrist
Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

0

2 months ago

actually, being, cherry, cherry on top, confidence, ever, genius, girl, humor, just, love, self, self-love, sexy, sweet, sweet girl, sweetest, top
Please make sure you are only drinking as much water as you REALLY need. We need that for the data centers. If you’re thirsty, AI is thirsty too.

0

3 months ago

AI, center, conservation, data, data center, drink, drinking, humor, much, need, only, please, resource, sure, technology, thirst, thirsty, too, water

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

16 shares on Reddit this month:

Ironically, the Internet was invented to save time.

69 shares on Pinterest this month:

Chickens only make one sound, because they can’t think outside the bawks.

76 shares on Facebook this month:

My wife just pulled me into the other room, and I thought she wanted to have a serious talk, but she just wanted to give me M&M’s without the kids seeing.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

The one thing I think most parents need to realize is, there’s absolutely no secrets that your child doesn’t share about you in the classroom.

45 shares on WeChat this month:

Most of your problems emanate from assuming that you are intelligent. Ease into your stupidity, and be free.

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

The only thing I don’t miss about the 90s is people smelling like cigarettes.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Shout out to all the experts on the web who know everything there is to know about absolutely everything.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

If I don’t duck my head when I drive into the parking garage, what’s gonna keep my car from hitting the ceiling?

31 shares on Instagram this month:

The Bible is 100% accurate when thrown at close range.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

What if AirPods had tongues and they started licking the inside of your ears to indicate they’re low on battery?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

If I were a billionaire, I wouldn’t build rockets to escape to Mars. I would build rockets to make everyone else leave Earth.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

I got called “pretty” today! Well, the full sentence was “You’re pretty annoying,” but I only focus on the positive things.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

If I could go back in time, I’d probably stop Bruce Willis from saving us from that asteroid.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

She took all my money, called me fat, AND stabbed me in the arm. I hate doctor appointments.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

The morning routine that takes the longest: finding the will to live.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

They’re bluffing when they say you can still get knocked off the nice list this late in the game. Santa’s been delivering gifts in Japan for hours by now; that list is locked. Do whatever you want.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

It’s so hot, I just saw a squirrel fanning its nuts.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

Making waves on Discord:

If I’m ever in a coma, please pluck my chin hairs.

Just landed via TikTok:

Dear Snapchat memory, that’s not my friend anymore.

Freshly posted on Discord:

You know those lines you see painted on parking lots? I know this will come as a shock to some of you, but you’re supposed to park between them.

Going viral on WeChat:

Your reply guys are like Pooh Bear. They wear no pants and are relentlessly trying to get in your honeypot.

Spotted on Telegram:

Apartments show you 44 pics of the lobby. Man, I ain’t living in there.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Making things weird is probably the only thing I’m good at.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I just need to get over everything that has happened to me in my entire life and then we can hang out.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

I’m trying to shower you with affection. It doesn’t matter how I got into your bathroom.

Broadcasted on X:

I literally never want to be the bigger person again. We can both go to hell.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

I see WWIII is about to kick off again. I’d best cancel the milk and get the cat in.

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

I have one of those metal briefcases handcuffed to my wrist, and inside… my grandmother’s meatloaf recipe.

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

Please make sure you are only drinking as much water as you REALLY need. We need that for the data centers. If you’re thirsty, AI is thirsty too.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨