My goal weight is getting a magician to saw me in half. Commentary:"Who needs the gym when you can just dazzle the audience with some magic tricks? 🎩✨🔮 Also, if you ever need a shortcut to shedding those extra pounds, just grab a magician! 🎩🔪💫" Related Funny Posts 🤝 I’ve never been cut in half by a magician, but I have worn jeans on Thanksgiving. Same thing. The magician told me to “Pick a card! Any card!” So I took his Visa. Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed and the other half don’t know how to do math. Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed, and the other half don’t know how to do math. A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.