Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Well, who knew putting on shoes could sound so scandalous? 👠🙉 Maybe next time, add some background music to your shoe-tying routine – might distract the eavesdroppers! 🎶😂 #ShoeFetishGoneWrong

comedy, funny situation, having, i, me, misunderstanding, morning, neighbor, sex, sh, situation

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84 shares on Discord this month:

Took my car to the mechanic because it was making a terrible noise. He removed the Mariah Carey Christmas CD, and now it’s fine.

44 shares on X this month:

Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.

65 shares on X this month:

Drinking at home is convenient, sure, but it’s nothing like the experience of leaving the pub feeling fifty bucks lighter.

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale.

69 shares on LinkedIn this month:

They are mad because you took that knife out of your back and used it to cut ties.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

I love staying in a hotel. I’m eating room service in bed while I watch the worst TV show of all time on cable television. I’m working out in the gym and swimming in the pool. I’m using the amenities. To hell with Airbnb.

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

80 shares on Facebook this month:

Windmill? Big fan.

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

Not texting back is only ok when I do it.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

I like when games that have no need for a jump button have a jump button.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Flirting when bored can really get you into some unwanted situations.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Hardly a day goes by without me being reminded that an academic degree has nothing to do with intelligence.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

The pumpkin was invented in 1942 when a watermelon put on a pair of corduroys.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

Sorry to any bands who see me yawn during their show. It’s not you, it’s just past 10pm.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where they’re coming from.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

I got a lot of Jedi advice for somebody who could be turned to the dark side by moderate traffic.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

Seen just now on YouTube:

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

Just shared via YouTube:

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

Shared recently on Twitch:

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Going viral on Instagram:

My so-called “friends” have asked that I stop referring to them that way.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Having a dirty mind and an innocent face is truly a blessing.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I have re-entered the Band of Brothers rewatch stage of male depression.

Trending via Slack:

To-do list: bite the hand that feeds me, put all my eggs in one basket, kill two birds with one stone, let the cat out of the bag, think inside the box, burn bridges, walk on thin ice, play with fire.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I hope the babies I was born with at the hospital are doing good.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My neighbor told me he heard me having sex this morning. I was putting on my shoes.

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

If I had a dollar for every time I didn’t know what was going on, I’d be like, why am I always getting all this money?

You will see blonder children than you would ever think possible at expensive ice cream parlours.

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

Today, I used a wire I’ve kept in my box of cables since 2011. Please applaud.

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My neighbor told me he heard me having sex this morning. I was putting on my shoes.

Keep the laugh going 😂

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

If I had a dollar for every time I didn’t know what was going on, I’d be like, why am I always getting all this money?

You will see blonder children than you would ever think possible at expensive ice cream parlours.

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

Today, I used a wire I’ve kept in my box of cables since 2011. Please applaud.

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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