Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

The problem with hiding snacks from my kid is that when I forget, they end up being hidden from me too.

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As parents we have to make sacrifices all the time. Today, I had to eat my kid’s ice cream because she couldn’t finish it.

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In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

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Therapy isn’t enough. I need to run my brain through the dishwasher.

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Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

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I think some outfits just aren’t meant to be worn unless you’re getting straight into a car.

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I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.

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Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.

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Bartenders be like “here’s that receipt, I’ll go ahead and put it on the wettest part of the bar”.

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Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.