Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Mentally saying “Wed-Nes-Day” when writing the word Wednesday.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

The funniest thing about Batman is that he legitimately doesn’t give a shit about crime that happens during the day.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Guys, stop showering. I need the water for ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

For the amount of meat you get out of clam, I feel like we could just leave them alone.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

What would you do if you were in my situation right now? The situation being that I’m drunk.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

If you respond to my sarcasm with better sarcasm, then I might just catch feelings.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

I suppose someone has to do all the consuming and obeying.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

It sucks when you have to stand on an escalator for 30 minutes because of a power cut.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,627

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

You told your cat how much you love him, but now it’s morning, the sun is out, you’re sober, and it’s just weird for both of you.

Seen just now on Slack:

Taking action is my least favorite thing to take.

Going viral on Instagram:

Kinda worried about something. Don’t know what it is yet.

Just shared via TikTok:

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Trending via Discord:

When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

Seen just now on Discord:

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Dog barking like an angry baby, baby crying like an angry dog.

Just shared via TikTok:

When I die, throw me on Mount Everest so it looks like I was trying to do something.

Just landed via YouTube:

Relationship status: nobody is cheating on me so that’s pretty neat.

Of course your crush is going to leave their spouse for you. That’s how delusions work.

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Of course your crush is going to leave their spouse for you. That’s how delusions work.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
🤣 "Oh sure, your crush is definitely going to leave their spouse for you, just like rainbows are made of cotton candy and unicorns pay taxes! 🌈🦄 That's how delusions work, my friend. Embrace the fantasy, but maybe keep a grip on reality too!" 😅

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Crazy to think the average Zoomer male just works, watches porn, and plays video games. That’s it. That’s their whole life.

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

Getting older is sexy. You moan more.

75 shares on Messenger this month:

There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

Before marriage, I would sit at a stoplight for hours because I had no one to tell me the light had changed to green.

16 shares on YouTube this month:

Leaving your house and returning back safely is such an underrated blessing.

56 shares on Reddit this month:

Not sure how to flirt, but I can make things awkward if you’re into that.

24 shares on Slack this month:

Did I eat too much candy today? My stomach says yes, but my heart says no.

63 shares on Snapchat this month:

TMZ will find out you’re dead before you do.

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

I really cannot be friends with picky eaters because it somehow always correlates to bigger problems and character flaws.

22 shares on Facebook this month:

I dare you to try and be more single than me.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

There are people who know when to reply all and when not to reply all, and none of them work at your company.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Actually, it’s illegal to be upset if you make a date on Halloween and they ghost you.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear men, my ‘biological clock’ isn’t my weakness. It’s your final deadline to prove you’re worthy.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Appliances always know when you’re getting a tax refund.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I walked into a holiday party, saw someone else already playing with the dog, and realized they’d stolen my entire social strategy.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,415

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

Laying next to my charger waiting for my phone to die, that’s how lazy I am.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Yes, I’ve gained weight. Too many people wanted to have sex with me. It was annoying.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

If I worked for UPS, there would be a 100% chance I’m falling out that open door when I turn a corner too fast.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Would have started saving money in kindergarten if I knew my life was like this.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

“You are what you eat”. I don’t remember eating a huge disappointment.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

The world started without permission again.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Girlfriend says because we got Chinese yesterday, we can’t get it again today. I don’t think that makes sense. They do it in China all the time.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Having a sunburn is so humiliating. Now everyone knows I was unprepared for the realities of the wilderness. It marks me as the weakest link. The hungry animals are closing in.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

A fun thing to do at work is call in sick and stay home.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Discord:

In your 20s and 30s, you’ll start rediscovering the niche interests and hobbies you had as a kid. It’s very important you revisit them. Your younger self was actually on to something.

Breaking via Snapchat:

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

Going viral on Slack:

Doing all of this just to die in the end! LMAO!

Just landed via Telegram:

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Career anxiety hitting at random hours of the day.

Just landed via YouTube:

Kids don’t love anything as much as they love arguing with each other.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Like, who are those little paper umbrellas trying to protect?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I think fathers lose their mind a little bit when they realize their daughters aren’t as forgiving as their wives.

Trending via Instagram:

Cover letters are so embarrassing. Why am I writing a love letter to this shitty company?

Trending via Threads:

Everyone’s a gangster until it’s time to pronounce Worcestershire Sauce.

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