Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can’t eat or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.
  • The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.
  • People who don’t talk to themselves are the weird ones.
  • Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.
  • I wanna date someone cuter than me, but sadly I am the cutest.
  • God, I’m not trying to rush you for my soulmate; but could I get the tracking number?