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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has copied:

Thinking about stepping down from being an adult, I’m just not in the right headspace for this position right now. I really appreciate the opportunity though.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ท has shared:

Wanna go back to my place and meow at each other?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ถ has viewed:

Roses are red. Blue got me thinking. I reckon it’s time for some excessive day drinking…

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has bookmarked:

I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

You try to fart in the toilet in the morning without waking the whole house and thanks to the brilliant acoustics of the toilet bowl, the horn of Gondor sounds.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฎ has viewed:

If you lift the cat off the couch and it sounds like Velcro, then it didn’t want to leave.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

Iโ€™ve had so much tea trying to get rid of this cold that Iโ€™m now speaking with a British accent and am fascinated with the Royal family.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has downloaded:

Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has bookmarked:

Your honor, I was in my villain era at the time of those incidents.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

815 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,977

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,977

Updated

47 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Breaking via Reddit:

Youโ€™ll be fighting for your life financially and thatโ€™s when all your toiletries finish at the same time.

Spotted on X:

I may be a beginner at some things, but I have a black belt in shopping.

Live now on Messenger:

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

Just shared via Messenger:

If I was a Spice Girl I would be Mild to Medium Spice.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Absolutely destroyed my bed last nightโ€ฆ I cuddled those covers so hard.

Shared recently on Instagram:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Spotted on Telegram:

Imagine if social media closed every day at 6pm like a shop.

Spotted on Instagram:

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Making waves on Discord:

Okay, that’s enough todaying for today.

Sorry Iโ€™m late, I was fighting for my right to party.

Sorry Iโ€™m late, I was fighting for my right to party.
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Commentary:
"Apologies for my tardiness, but someone had to bravely battle for the noble cause of partying! ๐Ÿ’ช๐ŸŽ‰ Better late than never, right? ๐Ÿ˜„ #PartyWarrior"

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

815 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,977

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,977

Updated

47 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ถ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has bookmarked:

Have you ever been so stressed that you’re calm?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ง has copied:

I don’t wanna brag, but I’ve been told I’m micro-management material.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has copied:

Science has enough bodies, Iโ€™m donating mine to English lit just to spice things up a bit.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

Those who run away from me are afraid that they might confess their love to me.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ณ has downloaded:

Tornadoes are the most relaxing things in the news.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡พ has downloaded:

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ซ has viewed:

100% of all babั–es are unemployed. Pathetั–c.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

People said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ผ has shared:

What I’ve learned in all these years of marriage is how to open a bottle of beer silently.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has shared:

If Pokรฉmon were real, state fairs would serve them deep fried on a stick.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Just landed via WeChat:

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Just shared via Slack:

Lovingly looking at my dog knowing Iโ€™m about to ruin her day with a bath.

Trending via YouTube:

I would describe my personal style as whatever is on top of the pile of clothes on the floor.

Just shared via Instagram:

My mom: sure use any towel. Also my mom: not that one.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, I shut it off and back on again, why are you still here?

Spotted on YouTube:

Why can’t hackers just delete everyone’s bad debt, credit, and mortgages?

Spotted on Slack:

Netflix be like โ€œwe know exactly what movie you talkin’ ’bout but we ainโ€™t got it lolโ€.

Just shared via Facebook:

The ugliest version of me is the version that comes out when I play board games. I don’t know who she is, but she is a monster. She is not fit for human interaction.

Going viral on Messenger:

Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I canโ€™t even understand the direct ones.

Shared recently on Slack:

Finally gathered all my thoughts and now they’re jumping me.

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ยฉ 2025. All fights retarded. ๐Ÿคช

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