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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

Sometimes I wonder if the plot ever gets tired of being twisted.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has viewed:

Unfortunately, I do love being the only person who knows exactly what I mean and the hidden meaning behind everything I do.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ป has downloaded:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has shared:

Summer is the best because thereโ€™s always a chance Iโ€™ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ง has downloaded:

โ€œAI is coming for your jobs!โ€ I would love to see AI be unemployed.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฉ has shared:

Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฏ has viewed:

Itโ€™s strange that watching paint dry is considered boring but going to an art gallery is considered interesting. Thatโ€™s just watching paint thatโ€™s already dry.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡พ has bookmarked:

Who is praying on my downfall right now and can you stop?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has downloaded:

People singing Happy Birthday to you feels like a real-life unskippable ad.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has downloaded:

If you have children, you can experience all human emotions before 9 a.m. on Sundays.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,313

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Making waves on Reddit:

Why waste words or gestures when a raised eyebrow is enough to make a statement?

Spotted on Telegram:

Never lie to Indian girls. That red dot be recording everything.

Going viral on Messenger:

Taylor Swift’s prenup is about to be longer than any book Travis Kelce has ever read.

Spotted on YouTube:

Sometimes I see how many vacations people take and I wonder if Iโ€™m bad with money or if they are.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Sorry about all the mean stuff I said when I was right.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I have no prime. I will evolve till I die.

Going viral on Telegram:

Shoutout to everyone pretending to have it together. Same.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

If it werenโ€™t for this whole job thingy that pays me money, Iโ€™d become a professional nap taker.

Making waves on Facebook:

Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

Going viral on Reddit:

Cynics are – beneath it all – only idealists with awkwardly high standards.

The belief that software engineers are uniquely intelligent has done unimaginable damage on society.

Witty quote humorously criticizing the overestimated intelligence of software engineers.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
"Ah, the fabled creatures known as software engineers ๐Ÿง™โ€โ™‚๏ธ Uniquely intelligent or just really good at Googling error messages? ๐Ÿค” Their mystical powers have caused mischief indeed, turning everything into binary code and making the rest of us feel like mere mortals in the land of algorithms and bugs! ๐Ÿคช๐Ÿ‘พ #WizardsOfTheDigitalRealm"

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Keep the laugh going ๐Ÿ˜‚

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

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Social Media Stars โญ

56 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The Slow and the Furious: me navigating a shopping cart through a grocery store filled with morons.

80 shares on YouTube this month:

Satan: “Would you please stop sacrificing animals to me. I’m not running a zoo down here.”

67 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I have neither the patience nor the crayons to show you why this is a bad idea.

32 shares on Twitch this month:

Cats clean themselves with their little fish breath mouths, but somehow they always smell like laundry detergent, vanilla, and happiness.

45 shares on Snapchat this month:

Do you all introverts ever open a text and think, ‘I’ll reply when I have the energy,’ and then it’s three weeks, and you have to live with the guilt of being a horrible friend.

90 shares on Reddit this month:

Please respond to the messages I almost sent you.

18 shares on Snapchat this month:

A spiral is just a circle that’s afraid of closure.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

That moment the doorbell rings and you tip toe to the window pretending you’re not home.

40 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Found a picture of me sitting on Santaโ€™s lap. Hard to believe itโ€™s been a whole year.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

I changed my Facebook name to “Benefits.” Now, when people add me, it says, “You are now friends with benefits.”

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

18 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I deserve a love so pure that my nervous system can finally rest.

21 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

The best way to use Twitter will forever be as an observer.

14 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

6 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My day starts backwards, I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake.

16 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

There’s nothing more satisfying than the little nap you have after hitting snooze on your alarm.

23 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

“I need a movie where the villain actually won!” Have you tried watching the news?

15 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I have to work because the baby is expensive. (I’m the baby.)

23 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Microdosing Christmas by being present.

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Sorry I missed your call, I was staring in horror at the screen, wondering why on earth you couldn’t just text me.

10 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

How old were you when you found out people in porn arenโ€™t actually in love?

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,403

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has shared:

If caterpillars are able to sleep for a long time and come out prettier, why cant I?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ธ has shared:

wearing no bra and oversized clothes is self-care at its finest

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has viewed:

After my funeral, I want one of my friends to take my phone and text everyone, “Thanks for coming.”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ป has bookmarked:

One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this,” it usually smells nice.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡พ has viewed:

I told my computer I needed a break, now it sends me reminders to stretch while I’m lying on the couch.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

When youโ€™re two beers in, and you realize she looks like God.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฑ has copied:

What part of โ€œhiiiโ€ do you not get? Iโ€™m in love with you.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฟ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has copied:

If you arenโ€™t sleeping with me, then youโ€™re sleeping against me.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Going viral on Messenger:

I’m doing a challenge called ‘November’ โ€” it’s where I just try to get through every day in the month of November.

Just landed via WeChat:

Science canโ€™t explain it, but some hairs can grow up to a quarter inch overnight. Never in a good spot though.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Becoming a DJ, but only because I like to impose my will and preferences upon the masses.

Live now on Discord:

My opinion of the American education system is largely based on how many nuggets I get when I order a ten piece.

Just shared via Snapchat:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that Iโ€™m sure itโ€™s just the one mouse, probably.

Seen just now on Messenger:

โ€œItโ€™s not that deep!โ€ Well, I have a shovel and I enjoy digging for meaning.

Freshly posted on Threads:

โ€œWe should get ticketsโ€ is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m fairly certain the person who put the first “r” in February also decided how to spell Wednesday.

Trending via X:

You can fake an American accent all you want, but โ€œliterallyโ€ will expose you.

Shared recently on TikTok:

An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

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