Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

We’ve had far more storms since we started naming them. We’re giving them the attention they crave. Just call it needy wind.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

All the wrong decisions in this country are based on the fact that my balcony faces out the back and so I can’t speak to the people.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

The new generation will never know what heartbreak feels like with wired headphones that have a loose connection.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

All these years on the internet we have been working for artificial intelligence.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Love to go to hipster restaurants and eat half a grilled cheese off an old license plate.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

“How would you describe yourself.” Me: I absolutely would not.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Those guys holding fish in their dating profile pictures are just demonstrating how they’ll carry you over the threshold after marriage.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Are you telling me these billionaires don’t have my best interests at heart?!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

42 minutes ago

3,420

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

I lost my composure in 1992. I haven’t seen it since.

Live now on Twitch:

Cats hear everything. They just don’t care.

Trending via LinkedIn:

It’s important that everyone takes really good pictures of me this summer.

Trending via TikTok:

I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

Just shared via Threads:

If you really think about it, extraordinary isn’t that great. It’s just an extra helping of ordinary.

Trending via Slack:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Crashed my car reading a billboard that said, “Don’t text and drive.”

Reported on WhatsApp:

If kids these days had a perfume, it would be called Audacity.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

“Careful. It’s slippery!” – Everyone, after you’ve already slipped.

Trending via X:

Be nice to your children’s teachers. Especially elementary ones, cause kids have loose lips and that teacher has all the dirt on you.

The best part about your kids being sick is you get to see exactly how shitty you’re going to feel in 48 hours.

6 months ago

The best part about your kids being sick is you get to see exactly how shitty you’re going to feel in 48 hours.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, parenting: the ultimate crash course in empathizing with your future self 🤒🤢 Who knew that a stomach bug could double as a crystal ball predicting your own misery? The joys of 'shared suffering' with your little germ factories! 😆👨‍👧‍👦 #ParentingProblems #GrossButTrue"

anticipation, being, best, exactly, feel, going, hours, humor, illness, kids, parenting, reality, sick

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

42 minutes ago

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

I have a condition that prevents me from dieting. It’s called being hungry.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

What idiot called it Catfishing your Tinder Contacts and not Playing With Matches?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Are you really a personal trainer or do you just want to wear shorts to work every day?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

I like to be alone a lot; it’s nothing personal.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Since the beginning of time itself, people have been wondering, what the hell is going on?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

You say “multitask” like it’s a good thing.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Me: This is my favorite. I would like to buy this exact same item of clothing again. The fashion industry: No.

Just landed via Facebook:

Don’t tell me what to do unless you are naked.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Why can’t I explore the dentist’s mouth too?

Broadcasted on WeChat:

This body is a temple; I suicide bomb every day.

Spotted on Twitch:

I asked myself if I was the problem and we said no.

Breaking via WeChat:

This year is starting to feel like it needs to be left outside until we see if it can act right.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

Making waves on Facebook:

Why do people always assume it’s a compliment when I tell them their baby looks just like them?

Live now on Telegram:

Some people are so judgmental, I can tell by just looking at them.

Just landed via Telegram:

Professor, set the time machine for right now. I’m trying to be more present.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴