Commentary:
Who knew that "new job immunity" was the latest health trend? Where's my cape and superpowers? 🦸♂️💼😅
30 Funny sick quotes
I just found out I have to go on dates to get a boyfriend. I’m sick to my stomach.
Commentary:
Dating: the only time stomach butterflies are both romantic and a symptom of illness 🤦♀️🦋
I’m sick of waking up thinking about the government, and going to bed thinking about the government.
Commentary:
Why not dream about a world where your biggest concern is whether your coffee is too hot or too cold? ☕️😴✨
Travelling through the US by car is beautiful because you feel like a blood cell in a very sick man’s body.
Commentary:
That's one epic road trip! 🚗💉 Hopefully, there's a rest stop at the lymph nodes! 😂🌎
I am sick and tired of going to the bathroom. It’s been forty years. It should all be out by now.
Commentary:
Forty years of bathroom trips and still not done—my bladder must be harboring secrets! 🚽🤔🤣
Y’all are single because y’all are looking for 90’s love in this sick generation.
Commentary:
Trying to find 90's love today is like bringing your Walkman to a Spotify party 🎧😂📻
Gravity called. It’s sick of holding me up.
Commentary:
Looks like gravity's ready to hand in its resignation! 🍃🙃
I wish other jobs let us solve issues by releasing diss tracks. Got some sick rhymes about Debbie from accounting and her poorly structured invoicing.
Commentary:
Dropping diss tracks at work: making audits lyrical and office beefs chart-toppers! 🎤😄 #WatchOutDebbie
We should be able to call in healthy: “I feel amazing today, and I’m not wasting it at work.”
Commentary:
I'm feeling way too great to be productive today 😄🌞 Calling in for a spontaneous day of self-care and laughter! 🎉✌️
I’m sick of living through history!
Commentary:
"Same here! Can we just skip to the part where we win a lifetime supply of vacation days? 😅🏖️📜"