Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who needs a workout when you can just take your kids shopping? 💪🛒💸 Just kidding, maybe online shopping is the way to go! 🛍️👩‍👧‍👦 #ParentingProblems"

advice, challenge, experience, family, fun, humor, kids, parenting, shop, shopping

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on Snapchat this month:

There is too much money in the world for me to be broke.

61 shares on Snapchat this month:

I love when kids tell me what they want to be when they grow up, because I’m still looking for ideas.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

“You’re so chill.” Thanks, I gave up.

25 shares on LinkedIn this month:

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

68 shares on Twitch this month:

My bad if I ever left you on read. I didn’t mean to open the message.

71 shares on Pinterest this month:

Do you think protein wants to be in all these things?

16 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

63 shares on YouTube this month:

Spice up your meltdown through interpretive dance.

52 shares on Messenger this month:

Save money by accidentally forgetting your wallet at home. Follow me for more financial tips and tricks.

38 shares on TikTok this month:

Babies sighing is so funny to me. My dear, the time to sigh has not come.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

I end all my sentences with “Just saying..” because ending them with “You bonehead..” would probably be considered offensive.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

No thanks, I’m already in a committed relationship with reading.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Probably the worst thing you can do when your wife gives you a disapproving look from across the room for being on your phone is finish typing this.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Wolves are just dogs that nobody has called a “good boy” yet.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

They’re bluffing when they say you can still get knocked off the nice list this late in the game. Santa’s been delivering gifts in Japan for hours by now; that list is locked. Do whatever you want.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Dear Black Friday… We all have big TVs now, put the groceries on sale.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Never forget that, just a couple of years ago, people were justifying paying $20,000 for a JPEG of an ape.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

A woman’s sigh can speak a 1000 words.

Shared recently on Instagram:

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

Going viral on Pinterest:

Don’t worry, I’m only dead inside from the waist up.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I told all my neighbors that I have a twin, so that when I see them in public I don’t have to talk to them.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Normalise following up to an ignored email with “helllooooooo?”

Spotted on Instagram:

Can’t believe I didn’t get invited to that party I would have made up an excuse not to go to.

Shared recently on Threads:

Not sure why I drink anymore. I get the same effect from standing up too fast.

Just landed via YouTube:

I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.

Just landed via Messenger:

December you will be good to me (threateningly).

Making waves on LinkedIn:

This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The easiest way to shop with kids is not to.

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

You don’t become cooler with age, but you do care progressively less about being cool, which is the only true way of being cool. This is called the Geezer’s Paradox.

Dear diary, I have to lock in tomorrow, fix everything, and do everything.

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

If you want your teen to finish her homework, tell her to fold the laundry.

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The easiest way to shop with kids is not to.

Keep the laugh going 😂

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

You don’t become cooler with age, but you do care progressively less about being cool, which is the only true way of being cool. This is called the Geezer’s Paradox.

Dear diary, I have to lock in tomorrow, fix everything, and do everything.

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

If you want your teen to finish her homework, tell her to fold the laundry.

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨