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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

They said I can never go back to that Vietnamese spot. They banh mi pho life.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Grandma complained that with age, her joints were getting weaker. Told her to just roll them a little tighter.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Be the reason someone burns sage.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Every gift guide for men is like “A flannel flask to hold your knife flavored whiskey.”

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

I bet once Bigfoot tries cheeseburgers, he’s gonna wanna hangout with us all the time.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

I don’t “make friends”. I get adopted by extroverts and they make me do things.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Becoming a psychic for the foreseeable future.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

54 minutes ago

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Reddit:

The only things that are really cool in my company are my salary and me.

Just landed via Snapchat:

The best part about Smarties is pouring them into an empty prescription bottle and shaking them all into my mouth while waiting in line.

Just shared via X:

I need to start hiding my money from myself.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Me: This is my favorite. I would like to buy this exact same item of clothing again. The fashion industry: No.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Flirting is easy until you have to flirt with the person you like.

Live now on Reddit:

One time, when I was a kid, I fell off my bike and hit my head so hard, I was briefly able to communicate with bees.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

Trending via Slack:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Going viral on Pinterest:

The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both — naked people arguing about politics.

Just landed via Discord:

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

The horror of being warned that the person you’re about to meet is “fine once you get to know them”.

6 months ago

The horror of being warned that the person you’re about to meet is “fine once you get to know them”.

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Commentary:
Oh, the classic "fine once you get to know them" warning – the social equivalent of a puzzle box with a missing piece! 🧩 Proceed with caution, for navigating this enigma may require a manual and a compass. 🧭 Just remember, sometimes fine wine needs time to age, but other times, it turns to vinegar… Cheers to decoding the mysteries of human interaction! 🍷😄

awkwardness, being, date, expectations, fine, first impression, horror, humor, impression, interaction, know, meet, meeting, once, person, personality, relationships, social, social interaction, warned, warning

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

54 minutes ago

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

What’s wrong with the people who come to visit on Sundays? Don’t they have a couch?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Brainwashing is always considered terrible and horrible. But there are many brains that would benefit from a wash.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

People say “go big or go home” like going home is a bad thing. Heck yeah, I want to go home, and I’ll have a nap when I get there.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Guys love being called “daddy” until the pregnancy test comes back positive.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Sledding is the best! (until you have to walk back up the hill)

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Yeah, I can explain that gap on my resume, I tried to move a picture in Word.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

I broke up with the gym. We were just not working out.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

Daylight savings is just a made up holiday to sell more daylight.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

Live now on Discord:

Dua Lipa is a fantastic singer AND Mario’s advice to Luigi when he wants to get on a slightly higher platform.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I giggle before I go crazy. Gotta start my engine.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

Spotted on Threads:

Going from summer clothes to winter clothes: “Okay!” Going from winter clothes to summer clothes: “I AM NOT READY!”

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Just shared via Reddit:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Breaking via Telegram:

Now that I have a standing desk, I’m adding manual labor to my resume.

Making waves on Telegram:

Does your life really flash before your eyes or is it just your brain closing all open tabs one last time.

Live now on WeChat:

I find as I get older it’s the little things that bring me joy. Like embarrassing my children.

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