33 funny horror quotes - Wordgag

The only ‘survival horror’ game I play is called ‘getting up every day and leaving the house.

May 28, 2026

There should be bloopers at the end of horror movies, so it relaxes you before bedtime.

May 27, 2026

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

May 27, 2026

The Scream movies were believable in the ’90s, but no one with any common sense answers unknown numbers on their phones anymore.

May 27, 2026

If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you are alone anymore.

May 26, 2026

If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won’t feel like you are lonely any more.

May 26, 2026

Sorry I’m unavailable… the horrors of reality insist upon themselves.

May 25, 2026

I need a horror movie where a kidnapper abducts a possessed child and finds out.

May 25, 2026

Be the reason why a count unleashes ancient horrors onto the world when he thinks of you.

May 24, 2026

Nighty night! Don’t let the horror of existence bite.

May 24, 2026

If i say “morning!” to you, it does not mean “good morning”, I am merely exclaiming in horror that it is morning.

May 24, 2026

Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

May 24, 2026

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

May 23, 2026

Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

May 23, 2026

Boy, did The Shining nail what it’s like being an only child.

May 23, 2026

The horror of being warned that the person you’re about to meet is “fine once you get to know them”.

May 22, 2026

The horror: “Come on, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

May 22, 2026

Texas Chain Saw Massacre is full of plot holes. What happens to the victims when they die? Is there an afterlife?

May 22, 2026

Horror movies have ruined the joy of skinny-dipping for me.

May 22, 2026

Even though he murders a lot of people, you can tell Freddie Kruger is a fun loving guy cause he goes by Freddie and not Fred or Frederick.

May 22, 2026

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

May 22, 2026

I saw The Blair Witch Project way too young and it made me afraid of projects.

May 22, 2026

Funny thing about zombie movies – they never seem to go after the cameraman.

May 22, 2026

October is the situationship of months. So briefly beautiful, but you know the horrors are imminent.

May 20, 2026

Monday morning looks like Jack Nicholson breaking through the door in The Shining.

May 20, 2026

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

May 19, 2026

The true horror genre: my old Facebook statuses.

May 19, 2026

Horror movies should add bloopers, so after watching the main film, you’ll be able to sleep.

May 19, 2026

Sorry I missed your call, I was staring in horror at the screen, wondering why on earth you couldn’t just text me.

May 18, 2026

There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

Apr 1, 2026

Who’s your favorite horror director? Mine’s God.

Apr 1, 2026

No one talks about the horrific event of meeting someone who is exactly your type.

Mar 31, 2026

Sex is cool, but have you ever made peace with the horror of being alive.

Mar 31, 2026