Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I could win awards for having a bad memory. In fact, I probably did. How would I know.
  • The man who invented autocorrect walks into a barn. He orders a bear.
  • It’s so hot out here, I saw a bird blowing on a worm before he ate it.
  • My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.
  • 50% of parenting is just trying to decide if that noise is worth walking up all of those stairs.
  • Ironically jogging pants are mostly worn by the laziest people.