Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.
  • “Hey you!” is short for “I have no idea what your name is.”
  • In filling out an application, where it says, “In case of emergency notify”, I put “Doctor.”
  • My ideal vacation would be to drop my family off at the airport and then have a week of peace and quiet.
  • Meatloaf is a good safe word. It means I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that…
  • Another beautiful day, ruined by responsibility.