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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Everyone is awful in their own special way.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

January is the Monday of the year.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

Uber Eats “you forgot to finish your order” notification is funny because I didn’t forget, I just came to my senses.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Babysitting a pair of twin babies right now and feeding them saying “here comes the airplane”. I don’t know, just feels weird.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

The early bird gets to cry for a little bit longer in the work parking lot.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I’d just laugh and search with them.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Date night idea: fight another couple.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Going out on Friday night will always be better than going out on a Saturday night.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

I voted for the candidate on the last yard sign I saw before pulling in. Slow children at play will lead us into the future.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

A murder on the dance floor would explain the panic! at the disco.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,859

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

Post beach shower is undefeated. Greatest feeling a human could experience. Throw a nap in there, and you will never touch serenity so close.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I’m soirée for my mispronunciation of French words.

Live now on WeChat:

I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.

Making waves on X:

Nobody says “boom shakalaka” like they used to.

Spotted on Messenger:

Sure, I could keep my thoughts to myself but I can’t see “Likes” in my journal.

Seen just now on Instagram:

When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Going viral on WeChat:

My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.

Just shared via Pinterest:

They’re putting me through the penny flattening machine at the zoo.

Live now on X:

Only thing sexier than a bad decisions is a bad decision with queso.

There is a reason I’m single and it’s called my face.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs a relationship when you have a face that can charm even the toughest critics? 😏✨ #SingleAndSlayingIt #FaceOfFlawless"

dating, face, humor, reason, relationship, self-deprecating, single

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I like winter because I fundamentally understand I deserve to suffer.

0

2 months ago

cold, deserve, humor, i, irony, self-reflection, suffer, understand, winter
Back to the Future and chill?

0

1 month ago

back, Back to the Future, chill, culture, date, future, humor, movie, pop, pop culture
We can put a man on the moon but we can’t find a good way to drink wine from a lying down position.

0

2 months ago

drink, good, humor, irony, lying, lying down, man, moon, problem, put, relaxation, space, wine
You should tell different people completely different things about yourself so that they then get into arguments when gossiping about you.

0

2 months ago

arguments, communication, deception, different, gossip, humor, people, self, should, strategy, tell, things, yourself
Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

0

2 months ago

comedy, CVS, fairy, fairy tale, humor, let, Rapunzel, receipt, shopping, tale
I’m always a little mean to men because, if you treat them like humans, they think you wanna sleep with them.

0

4 months ago

always, dating, gender, human, humans, humor, interaction, little, man, mean, men, relationship, sleep, think, treat

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on TikTok this month:

I like how people say “manage your depression,” like it’s a stock portfolio, but you’re heavily invested in sadness.

65 shares on WeChat this month:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

58 shares on Snapchat this month:

People be like, “I’m a work in progress” and never make any progress.

73 shares on Telegram this month:

Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to cancel my appointment at a sperm bank. I will just call them and say I can’t come.

67 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m officially at the age where I enjoy when people cancel plans.

44 shares on Instagram this month:

Do not EVER text while driving. Please use the giant iPad attached to your dashboard.

35 shares on Reddit this month:

There’s a disconnect between the decibel level of my car singing and my talent.

95 shares on TikTok this month:

Me rereading his texts after we’ve already said goodnight just so I can giggle and blush all over again.

36 shares on Threads this month:

Dog barking like an angry baby, baby crying like an angry dog.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

I won’t bore you with my problems because all of my problems are fascinating.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

That strange moment when you are trying to be serious, but then you accidentally smile.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

My husband was unable to find his coat earlier as he’d accidentally hung it up.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I support Bluesky in theory, but in practice, it’s like a JRPG with no bad guys.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Grape soda doesn’t taste at all like grapes, but it does taste like purple, and I don’t know how to explain that.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

The most attractive thing a man can do is hitting his own head and repeating “stupid, stupid, stupid”.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

I set my alarms extra early to make sure I have enough time to lay in bed and be angry about having to wake up.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

Breaking News: Local woman stuns in new unnecessary online purchase.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Knowing a guy who knows a guy is one of the most valuable things in the entire world.

Making waves on Telegram:

Work beers should be a daily thing.

Spotted on WeChat:

Wine shopping is 10% grape variety and 90% “ooohh, this one has a pretty label.”

Shared recently on Telegram:

If she tells you, she’s got a man, keep trying. Loyal women don’t even reply.

Seen just now on Slack:

The way Adele works for 6 months and then disappears for 7 years is very much the work-life balance I’m all about.

Going viral on TikTok:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

A Tinder type app, but it matches you with sandwiches.

Making waves on Discord:

Deleting tweets like a writer who burns his manuscripts.

Spotted on Facebook:

I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

Trending via Facebook:

Weed smokers be like, “Hold up — before we go to the store, I have to get scared.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

There is a reason I’m single and it’s called my face.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I like winter because I fundamentally understand I deserve to suffer.

Back to the Future and chill?

We can put a man on the moon but we can’t find a good way to drink wine from a lying down position.

You should tell different people completely different things about yourself so that they then get into arguments when gossiping about you.

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

I’m always a little mean to men because, if you treat them like humans, they think you wanna sleep with them.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨