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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Any room can be a panic room if you just give me a few minutes.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

To all the people who ask singles why they are actually single: Please don’t. We have sworn an oath and are not allowed to tell you the secret of our success.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Just a little reminder to laugh as much as you can, stay hydrated, and don’t let shitty people kill your vibe.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

I can’t believe the gall of this bladder.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Today is one of those days where I have to remind myself that you’re not allowed to strangle people.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

It amazes me how much exercise and extra fries sound alike.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Nothing says “not interested” quite like a Restraining Order.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

It’s weird that Usher doesn’t have any songs about showing people to their seats.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Jan 2, 2026

3,369

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Nothing flies faster than the ketchup out of the bottle when you only want a little.

Just landed via Twitch:

Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Doesn’t matter, Your Honor! I, for one, found it very funny.

Making waves on Reddit:

Whenever you feel like the world is falling apart, take a deep breath and remember you’re right.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Finally figured out why I look so bad in pictures – it’s my face.

Just shared via YouTube:

Girl dinner, but it’s the hearts of men who wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I wanna become so financially stable that God uses my pockets to bless others.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

If David Bowie taught us anything, it’s that being a little weird is better than being forgettable.

Spotted on Instagram:

Nature just builds 30 foot trees. Without even pulling a permit.

Going bananas on Discord:

Why did they call it long distance running and not fardio?

Typos is the Greek god of spelling errors.

2 months ago

0

Typos is the Greek god of spelling errors.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, yes, Typos, the mischievous Greek god who loves to play pranks on our keyboards! 🌩️ He sure knows how to keep us on our toes with those sneaky spelling errors! Maybe we should sacrifice a dictionary to appease him. 📚🙏 #SpellingMistakesAreDivine

error, God, greek, Greek god, humor, joke, spelling, spelling error, typo, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

0

2 months ago

autocorrect, Bob, character, favorite, feet, humor, mistake, star, Star Wars, wars
Mentally saying “Wed-Nes-Day” when writing the word Wednesday.

0

4 months ago

exercise, funny habit, habit, language, mental, mental exercise, mentally, pronunciation, saying, spelling, Wednesday, word, wordplay, writing
Never understood when the movie rating says “May contain nudity.” Are there people on the ratings board who aren’t sure if they just saw someone naked?

0

2 months ago

board, comedy, confusion, contain, critique, film, film critique, humor, just, movie, movie rating, naked, never, nudity, people, rating, ratings, ratings board, saw, someone, sure
People that never want to leave the house unite! Separately at our own homes.

0

2 months ago

homebody, homes, house, humor, introvert, leave, never, own, people, separately, unite, want
Group projects taught me how to do everything alone and trust no one.

0

2 months ago

alone, collaboration, everything, frustration, group, group project, humor, independence, learning, me, project, solo, taught, teamwork, trust
Plot twist: weed is addicted to me.

0

2 months ago

addicted, addiction, humor, irony, joke, me, plot, plot twist, surprise, twist, weed

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on Twitch this month:

Adulthood is wild. One day I’m transferring money to my savings account, and three days later, I’m transferring it out to save myself.

56 shares on Threads this month:

Life is a highway and I’m afraid to merge.

49 shares on Discord this month:

We’re all just a bunch of addicts, struggling with our drug of choice.

18 shares on Instagram this month:

This salad tastes like I’d rather be fat.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

You should be able to like an email instead of replying to it.

63 shares on Pinterest this month:

This is the dumbest apocalypse ever.

66 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Architects should try and design a house with no yelling.

45 shares on Slack this month:

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

12 shares on Facebook this month:

Seems like the mosquitoes swiped right on me.

19 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I remember when Britain used to be so rich, you’d be embarrassed to go into a Lidl or Aldi.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Feelings are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you shouldn’t stuff them in the trunk either.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t even know what I’d do if a sailor called me a landlubber. I’d probably lose my cool.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I might look calm, but in my head I’ve punched you in the face three times.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The only way to my heart is with a knife.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Once I get my UFO, don’t be asking me for rides.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I, unfortunately, was born without any interest in Avatar.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m trying to shower you with affection. It doesn’t matter how I got into your bathroom.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

It was me, I let the dogs out.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,685

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

I always feel sleepy, except when I want to sleep.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

“We should get tickets” is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

They should invent a brain that doesn’t whisper bad things to you.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Sitting in an antique chair is weird, like this thing has seen so many butts.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Just rolled over for a cuddle.. forgot I’m single… fell off the bed.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

I’m at the gym and I just saw someone put their water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

I’ve accepted I’ll never retire. I’ll be working up until my funeral… probably using a vacation day for it.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

What no one ever considers is that the kids are pretending to believe in Santa for the sake of the parents.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Somewhere there’s a girl ignoring 15 guys for a guy who gives her no attention.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

You can’t argue with me because I’ll just agree with you until you leave.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I miss when bills had nothing to do with me.

Breaking via Facebook:

My wife trusts me with a joint bank account but when I’m loading the dishwasher she always walks in the kitchen “to get something.”

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

Spotted on Messenger:

Are you really a personal trainer or do you just want to wear shorts to work every day?

Trending via Telegram:

My husband said it would be easier if we had a Christmas house that we moved into in December, instead of taking all these decorations out.

Spotted on Slack:

The most embarrassing thing in the world is when you make a fool of yourself in front of a baby and it doesn’t laugh.

Live now on WeChat:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I like to people-watch, but I’m an advanced people-watcher. When I spot another people-watcher, I like to watch them watching other people.

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