Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like the single life is here to stay! Who needs a significant other when you have Netflix and snacks, amirite? 🤷‍♂️🍿 #ForeverAlone"

commitment, dating, end, humor, life, me, not for me, relationship, single, single life, something, unfortunately, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok.” Well, I just made some shit up, and people believe me because I’m well read and use big words.

0

2 months ago

AI, asked, believe, big, ChatGPT, confidence, credibility, deception, grok, humor, i, intelligence, just, language, me, people, read, shit, storytelling, well, wit, words
British people be like “I was born in E-sex, grew up in Woke Ham, moved to Man Chest Hair, went to uni in Rotten Stall.”

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2 days ago

born, British, British culture, chest, culture, hair, ham, humor, i, man, moved, name, people, place, place name, pun, stall, stereotype, university, woke, wordplay
Now that the nights are getting cooler again, spiders often hide in your bed in search of warmth. Sleep well!

0

2 months ago

again, bed, cool, cooler, getting, hide, humor, nights, search, sleep, spider, warmth, well
I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

0

2 months ago

alien, aliens, bet, door, Earth, humor, i, joke, lock, past, safety, space
Babe, are you okay? You haven’t touched your dark humor all day.

0

4 months ago

babe, communication, concern, dark, dark humor, day, humor, joke, okay, relationship
I’ll rewind a movie, get on my phone, and miss the same part.

0

2 months ago

distraction, humor, miss, missed, missed moment, moment, movie, multitasking, phone, procrastination, rewind, same

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Telegram this month:

What’s wrong, babe? You’ve hardly touched my mixed signals.

64 shares on Slack this month:

That awkward moment when someone keeps watching you while you are eating.

78 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I accidentally relaxed too much, and now I don’t have enough anxiety to get stuff done.

97 shares on TikTok this month:

Any room can be a panic room if you just give me a few minutes.

42 shares on Slack this month:

My mind is like someone dumped the entire junk drawer on a trampoline.

77 shares on Telegram this month:

I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Amazon’s checkout needs a breathalyzer feature which cancels your order if you’ve been clearly drunk-shopping.

64 shares on Slack this month:

Sometimes I feel useless but then I remember I breath out carbon dioxide for plants.

74 shares on Telegram this month:

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

73 shares on Discord this month:

Dear diary, I have to lock in tomorrow, fix everything, and do everything.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

I drive home so quick after work like I’m late for the house.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

I have never seen a sad person sliding down a water slide.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Sometimes I rock it as a parent, other times I drop my phone on my sleeping child while taking a picture of it. It’s called balance.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

I drive like I’m immortal.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

Technically I’m still young, but according to my back pain I’m actually 69.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Reverse cowgirl because first dates are awkward.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

You truly don’t realize how young 20 is until you’re not 20 anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

“You’re under the weather?” We all are, idiot. It’s in the sky.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

They did so well traumatizing us about teen pregnancy, I’m still traumatized as an adult.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

It’s not a Sunday unless you completely waste it and then feel sad around 8 p.m.

Going viral on Telegram:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Spotted on Threads:

Sorry, I can’t today. I have to sit in my room and make matters worse.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Haunted house idea: a poorly lit Walmart littered with people you haven’t seen since high school.

Seen just now on Slack:

My mom didn’t raise a fool. Possibly a psycho, but never a fool.

Going bananas on Slack:

Me, when someone’s obsessed with me: Yikes! Me, when someone’s not obsessed with me: WTF?

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

All of humanities problems could be solved with a large meteor.

Just shared via Twitch:

The older I get, the more I realize how much I love being at home, doing nothing.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

If men didn’t exist, I would simply go for a 2 a.m. walk every night and listen to music in my AirPods.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Unfortunately, if you want to end your single life, you have to do something. So that’s not for me.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok.” Well, I just made some shit up, and people believe me because I’m well read and use big words.

British people be like “I was born in E-sex, grew up in Woke Ham, moved to Man Chest Hair, went to uni in Rotten Stall.”

Now that the nights are getting cooler again, spiders often hide in your bed in search of warmth. Sleep well!

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

Babe, are you okay? You haven’t touched your dark humor all day.

I’ll rewind a movie, get on my phone, and miss the same part.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨