Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a thousand bats to get out of social situations.
  • A drone, but for seeing which fast food drive-thrus have the shortest line.
  • I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?
  • If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.
  • Cicadas are all like, “Y’all mind if I scream?”
  • I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like “just kidding.”