When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s amore. When you swim in the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a moray.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

I don’t understand baby oil. What are we greasing up all those babies for?

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

We all have needs. I need my wife to go run errands so I can swipe the last donut.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Oh no, a login from a new device? And that device is my phone? The one that I use every single day? And the location is my house, you say? Thank you so much for warning me. I will contact Interpol.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Salad was likely invented after someone picked everything they didn’t like out of their meal and put it on a separate plate.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Due to foreseen circumstances, well within my control, I will be late.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

I received a DM telling me that I’ve offended some of you. I’m truly sorry; I meant to offend all of you.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Strict parents raise good liars.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I usually decompose after work rather than decompress.