Trendy Funny Quotes

  • You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”
  • The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.
  • Sometimes I’m out in public and I have to look down real quick to make sure I remembered to put on pants.
  • Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.
  • Everyone is gangster until they’re asked to reveal a “fun fact” about themself as part of a work event icebreaker.
  • I think nervous flatulence would be helpful if you were ever kidnapped.